January 2007 Comic Strips - Page 2
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Character
Sunday January 21,
2007
Tags albanian airlines, bad airlines, baggage, cheapest flights, corporate travel website, Food, security, travel must be booked, osama bin laden
Transcript
The Boss: From now on, all travel must be booked through the corporate travel web site. Alice: Our travel web site is terrible. It only lets you book the cheapest flight, and that's always on Elbonian Airlines. The Boss: Don't be such a snob. What's wrong with using a discount airline? Alice: Well, they list their destination airports as 'whatever looks soft'. The meals in first class are made of anyone who dies in coach. Their entire security screening process involves shouting at each passenger 'Are you Osama bin Laden?!!!'" "And I once saw a baggage handler wearing my dress. The Boss: Whiner.
Saturday January 20,
2007
Tags close the gap, good at something, jump ahead, strategy and capabilities
Transcript
The Boss: We need to find a way to close the gap between our strategy and our capabilities. Wally: Why don't we just pretend we're good at something and call it our strategy.Sorry...Didn't mean to jump ahead.
Friday January 19,
2007
Tags staff meeting, posting, six sigma methods, eliminate gap, waste of time
Transcript
The Boss: Carol, schedule a staff meeting. Carol: What's the topic?" The Boss: I plan to fuse Six Sigma with lean methods to eliminate the gap between our strategy and our objectives. Carol: I'll just say 'Waste of time'.
Thursday January 18,
2007
Tags password recovery, morons, forgot password, nostrildogmas, messed password, psychic
Transcript
Dogbert's password recovery service for morons Ned: I done forgot my password. Dogbert: What's your name? Ned: My name is Ned, I think. Is your password 'Ned'? Ned: Sweet baby jeepers, you're like some sort of Nostrildogmas!" Dogbert: Here's a brochure for my cult.
Wednesday January 17,
2007
Tuesday January 16,
2007
Tags sugared donuts, online, every week, plain donuts, plain, ratbert, licks
Transcript
Dilbert: Every week I order sugared doughnuts online and every week they deliver plain doughnuts. Dogcart: Those aren't plain. Ratbert licks the sugar off of them when they arrive. Dilbert: I work in a cubicle. I can get used to this too.
Monday January 15,
2007
Tags freely singing, glanced at, ratbert, singing
Transcript
Ratbert: TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!!! "Why do I need a reason?"
Sunday January 14,
2007
Tags actual meeting, day after meeting, pre meeting, thursday, evil, underpaid
Transcript
Did you set up my pre-meeting for Wednesday? "Yes. It's on Thursday." "You scheduled my pre-meeting for the day after the meeting?" "That was the only day that everyone could make it." "There's no point in having a pre-meeting after the actual meeting." "Sure there is. You can talk about how much better the meeting would have been if you had been prepared." "Here comes the pointy-haired boss. You'd better scurry away before he gives you more work." "There's a fine line between evil and underpaid."
Saturday January 13,
2007
Tags product with netork, run cable through shoebox, twigs and leaves, cat 5, cat 6
Transcript
Sales Engineer I've successfully integrated our product with your network." "It might look as if all I did was run a Cat5 cable through a shoebox full of twigs and leaves." "Is that all you did?" "A Cat6 cable would be overkill."
Friday January 12,
2007
Tags engineer, magic vendors fault, network, shoebox, twigs and leaves, engineering
Transcript
Client: Your network product appears to be a shoe box full of twigs and leaves. Sales engineer: Hoho! Just wist util my engineer does his magic and integrates it with your network! Make it look like another vendor's fault.
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