October 2018 Comic Strips - Page 1
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Character
Monday October 01,
2018
Use Company Products
Tags Dilbert, the boss, Wally, asok, alice, attention, products, required, use, bad, sign
Transcript
The Boss: It has come to my attention that none of you use the products we make. From now on you are all required to use our products. Asok: Aaaarg!!! Dilbert: Shoot me. The Boss: That's a bad sign. Wally: Nooo!!!
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday October 02,
2018
Death In The Family
Wednesday October 03,
2018
Slavery Or Work
Tags the boss, Wally, Dilbert, alice, succeed, nitpick, slavery, choice
Transcript
The Boss: We can only succeed if every one of you gives one hundred percent. Wally: I don't mean to nitpick, but wouldn't that technically be slavery? The Boss: No, because you have a choice. Wally: Didn't you just say the other choice is failure?
Thursday October 04,
2018
Bias For Action
Friday October 05,
2018
Do What Is Right
Saturday October 06,
2018
Spending The Company's Money
Tags Dilbert, price, high, ted, company, money, live, die, minute, sense
Transcript
Dilbert: This price is too high. Ted: Why do you care? You're spending the company's money, not your own. And the company doesn't care if you live or die. Dilbert: Give me a minutes to think of why that doesn't make sense. Ted: Take as long as you need.
Sunday October 07,
2018
Tags Dilbert, man, criticizing, face, head, arrogance, toxic, personality, garbage, plague, legs, truth, power, behind, back
Transcript
Man: I heard you were criticizing me behind my back. Try saying those things to my face! Dilbert: Okay. You're a hot-headed know-nothing who uses his arrogance to mask his total lack of talent. You ruin every meeting with your toxic personality. Every project you touch turns to garbage you're like a plague with legs. Man: Okay... That was harsh, but I respect you for speaking truth to power. Dilbert: You don't have any power. Man: Maybe it's better if you talk behind my back.
Monday October 08,
2018
Carol Can't Get The Printer To Work
Tags carol, Dilbert, printer, work, priorities, yammering
Transcript
Carol: I can't get the printer to work can you help? Dilbert: Sure, I'll be there as soon as I finish my twenty-seven tasks that are all higher priorities. Carol: How long will that take? Dilbert: I got three new tasks while you were here yammering.
Tuesday October 09,
2018
Boss Acts Interested
Tags the boss, Dilbert, single, childless, article, productive, kick
Transcript
The Boss: How's your family? Dilbert: I'm still single and childless. Are you acting interested in me because you saw an article saying it would make me more productive? The Boss: Apparently it doesn't kick in right away.
Wednesday October 10,
2018
Dogbert The Insultant
Tags Dogbert, business, insultant, journal, week, fat, stupid, question, list
Transcript
Dogbert the business insultant. Dogbert: Make a journal of everything you do for a week. Then stop doing everything that is on your list because it's making you fat and stupid. The Boss: I have some questions. Dogbert: Add "asks questions" to your list.


