October 2003 Comic Strips
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Character
Friday October 31,
2003
Tags rick, mustaully exclusive, transofrm, package ultra light, absorb impact, brick wall
Transcript
Dilbert: "Hey, Rick. Allow me to explain why your specifications are mutually exclusive." Rick: "Must transform." Dilbert: "If we make the package ultra light, there won't be enough material to absorb impact when..." "I don't think I'm getting through."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday October 30,
2003
Tags emailed, breakdown, format, unspoken, shining prefernces, mpiness, abyss
Transcript
The Boss: "I e-mailed you the expense breakdown. I need you to fix the format and send it out." Carol: "I will now read your mind to get the unspoken, ever-shifting preferences for the format." "I see nothing emptiness... the abyss..." The boss: "Add a chart."
Wednesday October 29,
2003
Tags evil dircetor, comapnay, free cholesterol screening, bacon and cheese hoagies, free hoagies
Transcript
"Catbert: Evil HR Director." "The company will provide free cholesterol screening on Tuesday." "At the same time, we're providing bacon and cheese hoagies across the hall. It's your choice." "I hate him, but I also love him."
Tuesday October 28,
2003
Tags employee of week, hose off, company hose, landing pad, helicopter, bird droppings
Transcript
The Boss: "Asok, you've been named 'Employee of the Week!'" "The title gives you access to the executive helicopter landing pad on the roof." "And by 'access' I mean you hose off the bird droppings every morning." Asok: "I get to use the company hose!!!"
Monday October 27,
2003
Tags lunch time, barely came late, work, eat, plaumbing, read apaper, non urgency, moring at offcie, slacker, stale job
Transcript
"Are you going to lunch?" "Lunch already?" "Sheesh! I barely had time to come late to work, eat breakfast, use the plumbing and read the paper." "You take your non-work seriously." "I'm trying to develop a sense of non-urgency."
Sunday October 26,
2003
Tags boosting prformance, vacation days, use all, recahrged, issed days, copeantetive advantage, retirement, return, 15 year vacation, 20 years in minutes
Transcript
"I have an idea for boosting my performance." "You wisely coached us to use all of our vacation days every year." "Because we come back recharged!" "Our renewed motivation is more than enough to compensate for ths missed days." "My plan is to leverage that competitive advantage." "I'll take a fifteen year vacation and return ten minutes before retirement." "Then I'll be so recharged that I'll pounce and do twenty years of work in minutes!!" "Unless it's near a holiday, in which case, do you mind if I leave early?"
Saturday October 25,
2003
Tags alternative universes, Dilbert, therapy session, dense objects, space time fold, fabric, whats happening?
Transcript
Dilbert: All week I felt like I was driving through alternative universes I was me, But Was different. Therapist: Have you been near any dense objects that would make the fabric of space-time fold onto itself? ONE WEEK AGO The Boss: will there be any unforeseen problems? Dilbert: whats happening to me?
Friday October 24,
2003
Tags dilbert died, funeral, casket, running with sciccors, what does mean, pastor, newspapaer slots open, money, ka ching
Transcript
WHos Todays Guest Cartoonist? ...when I first heard Dilbert had died while running with scissors,I , too was stunned.I too, asked "whats it all mean?" That 2, 247 newspaper slots are now wiiiiide open , baby! ...ka-ching! ka-Ching! ...sorry about the ka -things. *answer: go to Dilbert.com
Thursday October 23,
2003
Tags black shoes, cubicle, days of our lives, feel oddly drawn, life has purpose, mind altering day
Transcript
Who's today's guest cartoonist? Dilbert: This isn't my cubicle. Wally: Your horoscope says you'll have a "Mind altering" day Dilbert: I feel oddly drawn to watch "days of our lives" Wally: You look oddly drawn Dilbert: Im going to go to the mall and try on black shoes! Wally: wow! your life finally has a purpose * Answer: GO TO DILBERT.COM
Wednesday October 22,
2003
Tags hapy, spacious offcie, ocean view, workplace, personalized environemnt, brad pitt
Transcript
"Who's today's guest cartoonist?" Dilbert: "I'm so happy in my new spacious office with an ocean view." "Finally I have the workplace I've always dreamed of." Wally: "The personalized environment headset works, sir." The boss: "Brad Pitt! Shouldn't you put a shirt on?" ANSER: GO TO DILBERT.COM


