March 1992 Comic Strips

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #poll, #results, #name, #outside, #living, #room, #guy, #kitchen, #discouraged

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Ratbert says to Dogbert, "The poll results are in." Ratbert reads a document and continues, "You still have low name recognition outside of the living room . . . But some guy in the kitchen thinks he's heard of you." Ratbert continues, "Don't be discouraged, uh . . . Uh . . ." Dogbert yells, "Dogbert!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #television, #show, #ignorant, #people, #shadows, #alter, #voice, #electronically, #considerate

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I'm going to host my own television show." Dogbert continues, "It's called 'Dogbert's World of Amazingly Ignorant People.'" Dogbert continues, "Of course, I'll film you in shadows and alter your voice electronically." Dilbert replies, "That's very considerate."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 04, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #amazingly, #ignorant, #people, #visit, #economics, #fed, #increased, #money, #supply, #interview, #Politics

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Dogbert stands in front of a television camera holding a microphone. Dogbert says, "Welcome to Dogbert's World of Amazingly Ignorant People." Dogbert continues, "Tonight we'll visit people who don't understand economics but talk about it anyway." A man says, "So, I heard the Fed increased the money supply, but I checked my bank balance and it's the SAME as before." Another man says, "That isn't fair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #episode, #ignorant, #people, #australia, #globe, #alps, #kangaroos, #london, #inspiration, #bitter, #disapointment

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Dogbert stands next to a globe and says into a microphone, "On this episode of 'Dogbert's Amazingly Ignorant People' we ask people to find Australia on the globe." A woman looks at the globe and asks, "Is that the place with the Alps or the kangaroos?" A man says, "I think it's in London." Dogbert says, "When we return: inspiration becomes bitter disappointment." The woman says, "Hey! Who says it has to be on the OUTSIDE?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #episode, #amazing, #ignorant, #people, #history, #perished

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Dogbert: On today's episode of, "Dogberts amazingly ignorant people" we talk to people who don't know history. How many people perished because of world war II? Man: Uh... 400? Dogbert: The answer is fifty million. Man: Oh... Rounding.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 1992's comic on:


Tags #ratbert, #product, #testing, #doc, #cosmetics, #dangerous, #assignment, #hate

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Ratbert sits on a lab bench and asks a man in a lab coat, "What product are we testing today, Doc?" The doctor replies, "We'll be testing the safety of cosmetics. This will be your most dangerous assignment." Ratbert walks outdoors wearing eye makeup and blush. People yell, "Hey baby!!" and "Whoa!! Whoa!!" Ratbert thinks, "Sometimes I hate this job."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 09, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #smell, #suspected, #stopped, #neighbor, #cat, #trial, #pat, #pet

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Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. Dilbert asks, "How was your day, Dogbert?" Dogbert sniffs the air and asks, "Hey! What's that smell?" Dogbert smells Dilbert's hand and says, "Just as I suspected - you stopped to pet the neighbor's cat!" Dilbert says, "It meant nothing. It was more of a pat than a pet." Dilbert dials the phone and says, "Save your lies for the trial."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #attorney, #petimony, #allegedly, #pet, #Garfield, #pat

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Dilbert answers the door and a man in a suit says, "I'm an attorney for Mister Dogbert . . ." The lawyer continues, "He's suing you for 'petimony.' You allegedly pet the neighbor's cat . . ." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "See . . It was a pat, not a pet. Like this . . ." Dogbert, who is reading the newspaper, replies, "Oh look, it's 'Garfield,' your favorite . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #sues, #Dilbert, #petimoney, #amicably, #lawyers, #advised, #ugly

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Dilbert, Dogbert and a lawyer sit at a conference table. Dilbert asks, "Can't we handle this amicably, without lawyers?" The attorney whispers in Dogbert's ear. Dogbert says to Dilbert, "I've been advised that you're ugly."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 12, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #sues, #ratbert, #wtiness, #alone, #drinking, #root, #beer, #underwear, #sickness

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Dogbert's lawyer says, "I call Ratbert as my first witness." Ratbert sits on the witness stand. The attorney asks, "Is it true that Dilbert is a secret cat lover who often betrayed the trust of his faithful dog?" Ratbert replies, "It's true." Ratbert continues, "I often found him alone drinking root beer and reading 'Cat Fancy' magazine in his underwear . . . It's a sickness."