March 2021 Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Tina Asks For Help

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Asks For Help - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, co-workers, colleague, draft, review, busy, yes, time, sarcastic, sarcasm, suspicious, answer, innocent

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: do you have a few minutes to review my first draft? dilbert: yes. tina: i ask because usually you say you're to busy to help. dilbert: well, i said yes this time. tina: that's funny, because usually you're all, "i'm so busy." but today you have all the time in the world. dilbert: today i'm not busy. tina: i find that suspicious. dilbert yelling: take yes for an answer!!! tina: that's not how innocent people talk.

Because Of The Pandemic

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Because Of The Pandemic - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, covid-19, managers & supervisors, pandemic, technology, projects, behind, schedule, virus, laptop, coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: wally, four out of five of your projects are behind schedule. wally: that's because of the pandemic. boss: one of your projects is on schedule. wally: that's because of me.

Mask During Zoom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mask During Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, covid-19, video conference, call, laptop, mask, working at home, work, science, study, deny, video call, virus

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert in front of laptop on video conference call. voice from laptop: i'd feel more comfortable if you wore a mask for this call. dilbert: i'm working at home. i can't possibly give you a virus over a video call. voice from laptop: show me a study that proves that or else stop denying science. Dilbert: um...

Talking During Zoom Call

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Talking During Zoom Call - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, background, business, call, competition, stop, technology, video conference call, zoom, video call

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert yelling: dogbert! can you keep down the noise while i'm on zoom! dogbert standing on chair: i'm on a zoom call too. your call isn't more important than mine! dilbert speaking to his laptop: sorry, i can't stop the background noise. dogbert yelling from another room: can you keep it down in there? i'm on a zoom call.

Non Covid Cough

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Non Covid Cough - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags covid-19, health & safety, exercise, cough, control, infection, face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert walking outside with face mask on. dilbert thinking: oh, no... i feel a non-coved cough coming on. must... control it... to avoid... looking infected. dilbert on ground holding mouth. man on sidewalk: what's up with him? women on sidewalk: he looks infected.

Catbert Keyboard Audit

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Catbert Keyboard Audit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, human resources, keyboard, audit, remote, workers, silly, laptop

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert at laptop. catbert: human resources is doing keyboard audits on all remote workers. catbert: looks like you have a keyboard right there. catbert laying on keyboard: mmm-mmm! dilbert: will this take long?

Closing Credits

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Closing Credits  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, closing credits, finish, zoom, laptop, goodbye, people, leave, sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert on video conference call: okay, well, i see the closing credits scrolling by, so we must be done with our zoom call. voices from laptop: oh, i guess so. well, goodbye everyone. bye! dilbert: goodbye! dogbert: you added closing credits to a zoom call? dilbert: it's the only way to get people to leave.

Loud Using Zoom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Loud Using Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, zoom, mortgage, loud, noise, calls, war, blackmail, surprise, laptop, imagine

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: can you please stop talking so loudly on your zoom calls?!!! dilbert at home in front of laptop: i'm sorry, but i pay the mortgage, and i have a right to make as much noise as i want in my own house. dogbert: oh, wow. did you really play the "mortgage card" on me? dogbert: this is war! wait until you see what i do in the background of your next zoom call. i don't want to ruin the surprise, but think of the number-one worst thing you can imagine me doing. are you picturing it in your mind? it's bad isn't it? now imagine at the same time i also start doing the second-worst thing you can imagine. dilbert: noooo!!!!

Disinfecting Keyboard

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Disinfecting Keyboard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, fire, software, vendors, disinfect, keyboard, random, message, accident, mistake

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i fired all of our software vendors and erased my hard drive as you ordered. boss holding bottle of disinfectant: really? i was disinfecting my keyboard, and i must have sent you a random message by accident. oops.

Deep Fake Zoom

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Deep Fake Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, video conference, zoom, call, deep fake, program, generic, employee, work, sarcasm, cell phone, laptop

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert looking at phone on couch at home. dogbert: i thought you said you had a zoom call that would last for hours today. dilbert: i built a "deep fake" version of myself to take zoom calls and say generic employee stuff. next slide is boss in from of laptop on video call. boss: dilbert, do you have anything to add? dilbert: i don't know if i'm working hard or hardly working. har-har!