You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Wally's Email Makes No Sense

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Email Makes No Sense - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 2016's comic on:


Tags #bot, #deception, #laziness, #work ethic, #obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally's emails make no sense. Dilbert: He replaced himself with a chatbot. He designed the chatbot to be useless so you'd think it was him. Boss: And he thought this would fool me? Dilbert: He's been gone for four months.

Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot

Thank you for voting.
Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #working from home, #work ethic, #technology, #bot

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I got approval to work from home. My chatbot will answer all of my emails and text messages. Dilbert: Chatbot answers would be useless. Wally: I hope so. Otherwise it wouldn't sound like me.

Two Ways To Avoid Listening

Thank you for voting.
Two Ways To Avoid Listening  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #mentor, #listening, #attention

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: There are two good ways to avoid listening to others. 1.) Do all of the talking yourself, and 2:) be too busy to listen. Asok: That sounds simplistic. Wally: I'm late for a meeting.

Biggest Risk To Happiness

Thank you for voting.
Biggest Risk To Happiness  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2016's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #Advice, #complaining, #conversation, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: The biggest risk to your happiness involves listening to other people. When they aren't trying to make you work, they're complaining. Asok: I hate that. Wally: Shhh. Don't talk.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2016's comic on:


Tags #goals, #accomplishment, #consciousness, #death, #achievement, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you have any long-term goals? Wally: Just death. Dilbert: Death isn't a goal. Wally: It's the best kind. This way, I can go out as a winner. With my last breath, I plan to do a fist pump and yell, "I did it!" What's your long-term plan? Dilbert: I plan to use brain imaging technology to map my mind. Then I'll create a digital copy of myself to live forever in a software simulation. Unless I already did. Wally: Give yourself a fist pump, just in case.

The Boss's Wife

Thank you for voting.
The Boss's Wife  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2016's comic on:


Tags #artificial intelligence, #ai, #inventions, #engineering, #Women, #moods, #moody

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The Nobel Prize Committee nominated you for your block of wood that imitates human intelligence? I wonder what the block of wood thinks about that. Wally: It's in a bad mood and not talking. Boss: Did you model that thing after my wife? Wally: Now you've insulted it.

Wally's Device Has Human Emotions

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Device Has Human Emotions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #artificial intelligence, #ai, #invention, #human, #humanity, #misanthrope

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is it true that you invented a device with human intelligence and human emotions? Wally: Yes. I'd give you a demo, but the device is depressed and wants to be left alone. Dilbert: It looks like a block of wood. Wally: I'm only trying to copy the human mind. There's no reason to over-engineer it. Dilbert: I can respect that.

Block Of Wood Is In A Bad Mood

Thank you for voting.
Block Of Wood Is In A Bad Mood  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 23, 2016's comic on:


Tags #ai, #artificial intelligence, #scam, #gullible, #emotions, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I heard you invented a device with human intelligence and human emotions. Can I ask it a question? Wally: It's in a bad mood. It's not talking. CEO: Wow! It's just like people! Wally: You'd better leave before you make it cry.

Human Intelligence

Thank you for voting.
Human Intelligence  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 2016's comic on:


Tags #ai, #artificial intelligence, #humans, #arguing, #human nature, #intelligence, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I started by giving the device human intelligence. Then I added human emotions. Now it answers every question by accusing you of having a secret agenda. Boss: Just like people!

Wally Builds An Mvp Version

Thank you for voting.
Wally Builds An Mvp Version - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #ai, #technology, #fake, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I built a minimum viable product, or MVP, as I like to call it. Boss: That's a block of wood. Wally: I call it "Artificial Intelligence." Ask it any question. Boss: What is my middle name? Wally: It's being shy, just like people. Boss: It has emotions,too?