August 2019 Comic Strips
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Character
Saturday August 31,
2019
Unconscious Bias
Tags obliviousness, office workers, racism, training, bias
Transcript
Carol: You haven't completed the mandatory training on unconscious bias. Dilbert: I'm not biased. Carol: Maybe you are when you are not conscious. Dilbert: I'm a bigot in my sleep? Carol: And you look like a drooler.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday August 30,
2019
No One Is Taking Advice
Tags Advice, confidence, employees, jobs, office workers, youth
Transcript
Man: I keep telling people how to do their jobs, but no one takes my advice. Wally: Maybe that's because you are so inexperienced that you don't realize how bad your advice is. That's ridiculous. How could I be so wrong and yet feel so confident? Wally: I miss being young.
Thursday August 29,
2019
The Inexperienced Employee.
Tags Advice, criticism, employees, insults, office workers
Transcript
Man: Let me tell you how to do your job. You need to get all the vendors in the same room and insult them until they offer you discounts. Dilbert: That sounds super dumb. Man: That's what they said to Galileo old man.
Wednesday August 28,
2019
Inexperienced Employee Advice
Tags criticism, employees, irritation, office workers, sarcasm, experience, arrogant
Transcript
Man: Hi, I'm an inexperienced employee who tells experienced employees how to do their jobs. I compensate for my lack of experience with a thing called arrogance. Dilbert: That sounds worth-less. Man: Oh, yeah? Then why does every company have one of me?
Tuesday August 27,
2019
Skipping Teambuilding
Tags boss, celebration, irritation, managers & supervisors, office workers, parties, sarcasm, team
Transcript
Alice: Can I skip the team-building celebration to get some work done? Boss: No, because I'm trying to change the culture. Alice: To what? Angry and unproductive? Boss: Trust the cake.
Monday August 26,
2019
Teambuilding Celebration
Tags celebration, employees, office workers, parties, rules
Transcript
Boss: Dilbert, I want you to plan the team-building celebration. Make sure there is no alcohol, no dancing, no touching, no flirting, and no joking around. Dilbert: Can we eat? Boss: Only food that has never been near a peanut.
Sunday August 25,
2019
Wally Writes Fiction
Tags budget, business, managers & supervisors
Transcript
wally: i decided to try my hand at writing fiction. i like writing fiction because it doesn't require any research. i can literally make up a story out of nothing. i feel sorry for nonfiction writers. they have to get the facts right. but a fiction writer only has to use imagination. i can make any wild assumptions about the future that i want. boss: i asked you here to talk about your budget forecast. wally: that's what i was talking about.
Saturday August 24,
2019
Nervous About Presentation
Tags Advice, managers & supervisors, nervous, office workers, presentation
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm nervous about the presentation I have to give to the board. Do you have any advice? Boss: Don't blow it, or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: I heard it's good to imagine the audience naked. Boss: Report yourself to H.R.
Friday August 23,
2019
Ceo Visits
Tags boss, employees, hiding, managers & supervisors, office workers
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO is coming for an office visit tomorrow. I need you to tidy up your cubicle and hide in the bathroom when he visits. Wally: Won't he wonder where everyone is? Boss: No, this is more of a "you" thing.
Thursday August 22,
2019
Agreeing With The Boss
Tags boss, climate change, employees, managers & supervisors, meetings, office workers, agree
Transcript
Boss: As my new pet employee, your job is to agree with everything I say in meetings. Can you do that? Wally: Sure. How hard could it be? Boss: Climate change is caused by gravity. Wally: That's right!

