September 2003 Comic Strips - Page 2
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Character
Friday September 12,
2003
Tags slither away, doomed project, assistant, teach you, manager skin, speaking metaphor
Transcript
Dogbert: "You need to slither away from your doomed project before you get blamed." Dogbert: "My assistant will teach you how to shed your project manager skin." Snake: "Yello!" Skeleton: "Ow! Ow! Ow! How's this so far?" Snake: "Impressive, but we were speaking metaphorically."
Saturday September 13,
2003
Tags heart and sould, high speed data, talent pool, in charge, mentor, panicking
Transcript
Wally: I've put my heart and soul into the high-speed-data-by-sewer project. But I believe in developing outr talent pool, SO I recommend putting Asok in charge if the project, I will be his mentor, AsoK; wow! what should I do first? Wally: I wouldn't rule out panicking.
Monday September 15,
2003
Tags project manager, returned calls, emails, mentally superior, finished porject, sleep national holidays
Transcript
Asok: "Since I became project manager, no one has returned my calls or responded to my e-mails." Asok: "Luckily, I'm an I.I.T. graduate, mentally superior to most people on Earth, so I finished the project myself." Wally: "Are you tired?" Asok: "I am trained to only sleep during national holidays."
Tuesday September 16,
2003
Tags india institute of technology, huge brain, mental superiority, re heat tea, forehead, fire
Transcript
Asok: "At the India Institute of Technology, I learned to use my huge brain." "But I try not to frighten ordinary people with any gratuitous displays of mental superiority." "For example, I no longer reheat my tea by holding it to my forehead and imagining fire."
Wednesday September 17,
2003
Tags audio lessons, hundred million, showing up, performing ceo, be the person, buy audio lessons
Transcript
Dogbert: Would you like to make a hundred million dollars for just showing up at work? Dogbert: My audio lessons teach you how to become an underperforming CEO. $19.95 Step One: become A CEO> Step Two: Be the sort who would buy these audio lessons.
Thursday September 18,
2003
Tags actual question, delivery, fantasize, imaginary one, plastic casing, ripping moustache, two week
Transcript
Dilbert: Did you order the plastic casings I need? They take two weeks for delivery. DIlbert: I see that you've cleverly avoided my actual question in favor of an imaginary one involving delivery times. Now Im fantasizing about ripping off your mustache and using it to shine your head. I hear that a lot.
Friday September 19,
2003
Tags big picture, drifting, floating, above earth, plane, coach, in plane
Transcript
Dilbert: "I recommend that we look at the big picture and view it from 20,000 feet." The Boss: "Drifting.. floating above the Earth.. wait.. a plane is coming right at me! NO-O-O-O!!!" Dilbert: "Maybe you should imagine you're in the plane." The Boss: "GAAAA!! I'm in coach!"
Saturday September 20,
2003
Tags can't buy happiness, expensive possessions, pople envious, tarde happiness for money, whacked
Transcript
Dogbert: "Bob, remember that money can't buy happiness." Bob: "But it can buy expensive possessions that make other people envious, and that feels just as good." Dogbert: "And you can pay to have people whacked." Bob: "Can I trade my happiness for some money?"
Monday September 22,
2003
Tags lead odg, view never changes, look at face, imlying, insightful analogy
Transcript
The boss: "Remember, if you're not the lead dog, the view never changes." Carol: "I'm not the lead dog, and I have to look at your face all day. The Boss: "What are you implying?" Carol: "I was admiring your insightful analogy."
Tuesday September 23,
2003
Tags tasks, a, b or c priorities, a priorities, after i update, left in tank
Transcript
Wally: "Every morning I rank my tasks as A, B, or C priorities." The Boss: "And then you work on the 'A' priorities first?" Wally: "To be honest, after I update the list, there isn't much left in the tank."
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