Haven't Submitted Paperwork Comic Strips - Page 1

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

172 Results for Haven't Submitted Paperwork

View 1 - 10 results for haven't submitted paperwork comic strips. Discover the best "Haven't Submitted Paperwork" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags haven't submitted paperwork, raise, show up, talk to boss, too busy, secretary needs secretary

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks the Boss's secretary, "Carol, do you know why my raise hasn't showed up in my pay yet?" Carol replies, "I haven't submitted the paperwork." Carol says, "I'm too busy to do it. Maybe you should talk to my boss about getting me a secretary." Dilbert says, "Carol, YOU are the secretary." Carol replies, "That'll cost you another month."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags retail business, service business, buy company's prodcut, pulling teeth, commissions to salary, free from tyranny, customer service, less than ideal, no paperwork

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I want to buy your company's product but it's like pulling teeth with you. Man: Ha ha! I switched from commissions to a guaranteed salary. I'm free from the tyranny of customer service! Dilbert: This is less than ideal. Man: No paperwork for me! Woot! Woot!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dogcart versus catbert, dilbert death, bob the donosuar, fur wedgie, lost paperwork, ordering execustion

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert versus Catbert." Dogbert stands on Catbert's desk and says, "I understand you've sentenced Dilbert to death." Catbert asks, "Is that a problem?" Bob the Dinosaur stands behind Dogbert and looks menacing. Dogbert says, "My assistant, Bob the Dinosaur, will now demonstrate how to give a cat a 'fur wedgie.'" Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. He says to Dogbert, "I've been pardoned. Somehow they lost the paperwork ordering my execution." Dogbert responds, "It probably fell into a crack."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags benefit of doubt, haven't bothered, laziness, low performance rating, many issues, difficult

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Alice, I gave you a low performance ranking because you haven't bothered me all year." The Boss explains, "Logically, if your job were difficult and important, you would have brought me many issues to resolve." Alice asks, "Can you think of ANY other reason I might not bring you issues?" The Boss replies, "Yeah, laziness. But I gave you the benefit of a doubt."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags raise didn't go, secretary, didn't do paperwork, initite disciplinary actions, disciplinary action forms

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert tells the Boss, "My raise didn't go through because your secretary didn't do the paperwork." Dilbert continues, "I demand that you initiate disciplinary actions against her!" The Boss says, "I'll try, but . . ." The Boss stands behind Carol's desk and asks, "Carol, could you get me one of those disciplinary action forms?" Carol replies, "Sure, right after my ski trip to hell."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company vision, business plan, business plan blank, confidentail, not empiwered, doomed, haven't seen plan

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss hands him a paper and says, "Here's the company vision and business plan." Dilbert reads, "'Vision: Empowered employees working toward a common plan.' Sounds good." Dilbert says, "But the business plan is blank." The Boss says, "It's confidential." Dilbert asks, "How am I supposed to know what to do?" The Boss says, "I'll yell at you if you do the wrong thing." Dilbert says, "I thought I was empowered." The Boss says, "Don't be so literal." Dilbert turns around and says, "I'll just keep doing what I was doing." The Boss screams, "No!!! You fool!!!" Dilbert faces the reader. Dilbert asks, "We're doomed, aren't we?" The Boss says, "I don't know. I haven't seen the plan."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, name omitted, reorganization, paperwork, org limbo, sounds scarey

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss comes up to Alice and says, "Alice, your name was accidentally omitted from the reorganization paperwork." The boss says, "You're in a place known only as org-limbo." Alice says, "Stop making it sound scary!" The boss replies, "Where did Alice go?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags created time line, identified resources, revise timeline, re examine, thousand ways, haven't done anything

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "In only one week my project team has created a time line and identified the resources we need." "Next week, we plan to revise the time line and re-examine our resource needs." "Good work." "There must be a thousand ways to say I haven't done anything." "Wait.."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags porject, top prioroty, tell everything, bored, can't stay awake, haven't talked yet, gets worse

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Your project is my top priority. Tell me everything that I need to know. In so bored...cant...stay...awake. Dilbert: I haven't started talking yet. The Boss: Int gets worse??! Dilbert: oo okay

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the contractor, easy to get rid of, paperwork, point finger, firing finger

View Transcript

Transcript

The Contractor "No pressure, but do you have any idea how easy it would be to get rid of you?" "There isn't even any paperwork. I just point my finger and you're history." "Here comes the firing finger. Oooh...Watch out!"