2008 Comic Strips - Page 1

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #day at work, #garbage pickup, #holiday, #interrupted, #victory, #tainted

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Dilbert: I had a great day at work. For come reason, no one interrupted me, so I got a lot done. Garbage man: Today is a holiday." Dilbert: All of my victories are tainted."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #day off, #empty office, #holiday, #loser, #new years day, #work, #worked

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Tina: What did you do for New Year's Day? Dilbert: I forgot it was a holiday and came to work for ten hours." Tina: That's sort of loserish. Dilbert: Thanks for labeling it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #traffic, #work, #co worker, #shopping, #week, #attractive nuisance

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secretary: Wally, did you finish the traffic estimates?" Wally: I didn't have time. I spent all week shopping on the company's online supply ordering site. Hey, you can't blame the guy who just uses the attractive nuisance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #friday morning, #bagel friday, #separates us, #special, #bagels, #reward, #business

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The Boss: Wally, I need you to attend a meeting on Friday morning. But that is bagel Friday. It's the only thing that separates us from the animals. The Boss: You could get a bagel to go. Wally: It's as if you don't want to understand.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #intern, #mole, #secret, #undercover, #hidden, #blended, #rodent, #animal, #mouselike

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Asok: Someone said our pointy-haired boss hired a mole. Moles creep me out. Dilbert: Mole is a figure of speech. It's not literally a mole. Asok: Why do I feel tiny eyes on the back of my neck?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co worker, #tired, #dead, #died, #afterlife, #zombie, #alive again, #pictures in heaven, #eyes closed

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Topper Dilbert: I didn't get much sleep last night. Ted: That's nothing. I haven't slept in a month. Dilbert: Wouldn't that kill you? Ted: It did, but that's nothing. I spent a week in the afterlife, then I returned to this world as a zombie. I taught myself homeopathy and discovered a cure for zombies. Now I'm alive again. Please be done...Please be done...Please be done... I took pictures of heaven. Alice: Gaaa!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mole hired, #boss, #sneak, #mole as mole, #people think, #gas bag, #bad press, #bad thoughts, #worthless, #self important

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The Boss: What have you learned this week working as my employee mole? Mole: Some of the people in this building think you're a worthless, self-important gas bag. The Boss: What do other people think? Mole: They don't know you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #meeting, #miss step, #mole hired, #reporting, #chilling effect, #business

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RAtBert: I'm the official department mole. I'll be reporting your every misstep to your pointy-haired boss. Dilbert: Won't this have a chilling effect on our creativity and honesty?" RatBert: That didn't take long.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company priorites, #intern, #meeting, #over thinking, #priorities, #projects, #co workers, #business

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The Boss: And those are the company priorities for the coming year. Any questions? Asok: Should I be concerned that none of my projects relate to any of those priorities? Wally: You're over thinking again. Asok: Sorry.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #aligns with priorities, #budget, #lying, #priorities, #questiong

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The Boss: Tina, put together a document showing how our budget aligns with out priorities. Tina: It doesn't. The Boss: Write it so it seems like it does. Tina: Isn't that lying? The Boss: I call it leadership by words.