Business Case Apporved Comic Strips - Page 1

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Business Case Apporved

View 1 - 10 results for business case apporved comic strips. Discover the best "Business Case Apporved" comics from Dilbert.com.

Video Lunch Meeting Rules

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Video Lunch Meeting Rules - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meeting, #zoom lunch meeting, #zoom, #lunch, #beaver, #dam, #bubblewrap, #ugly, #eater, #video, #off, #on, #sarcasm, #microphone

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: welcome to our first zoom lunch meeting. if you chew louder than a beaver making a dam out of bubble wrap, please turn off your microphone. and if you are an ugly eater... voice from laptop: we get it. turn the video off.

Disagreement Sides

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Disagreement Sides - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #disagreement, #Opinion, #facts, #agreement, #sides

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i'm having a disagreement with alice, and i want you to side with me. dilbert: how about i make up my own mind based on the facts? tina: that's not going to work for me.

Firing By Text

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Firing By Text - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employment, #text, #smartphone, #fire, #remote, #workforce, #thumbs-up, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: the best part of having a remote workforce is firing them by text. boss typing on smartphone. Boss: ted, you're fired. tap tap tap. catbert: it's done? boss: no, i also need to give a thumbs-up to his crying face emoji.

Loser Detector

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Loser Detector - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #invention, #losers, #accurate, #detection, #pings, #backwards, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

in meeting room. dogbert: i invented a device that can detect losers. boss: how do i know if it's accurate? dogbert: point it at a know loser and see if it pings. boss pointing it at employees: boss: hey! it knows ted is a loser! ha ha ha!!! it says dilbert and alice are losers too! and carol and wally too! ha ha ha!!! this thing is totally accurate! dogbert: you're holding it backward. boss: how exactly does it detect losers? dogbert: they're the ones who hold it backward.

Too Busy To Train

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Too Busy To Train - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #jobs, #managers & supervisors, #two, #replacement, #quit, #death, #stare, #new, #person, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'm working two jobs since ted quit. maybe you could fire a replacement for ted. boss: that won't work because you're too busy to train a new person. panel changes building. voice from building: stop making that death stare and get back to your two jobs.

Inspirational Poster

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Inspirational Poster - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #sarcasm, #new, #inspirational, #poster, #apathy, #die, #criticize, #draft, #not good

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i'm going into the inspirational poster business. so far, all i have is "nothing matters because you're going to die anyway." dilbert: that's not good. dogbert: it's easy to criticize a first draft.

Insults By Email

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Insults By Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #communication, #office workers, #insult, #email, #comfortable, #belittle, #Opinion, #move away, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i feel a deep need to belittle your opinion, but it would be awkward doing it in person. would you mind moving away from me so i can email you my insult? dilbert in hall by himself. dilbert: a little more....

Ted Will Train You

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Will Train You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #training, #absence, #coffee, #helpful, #problem, #successful, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ask ted to show you how to do his job functions before he leaves for his new job. panel changes to office building. dilbert: what if he isn't helpful? boss: then i'll fire you for failing. panel changes back in office: dilbert: do you see any problem with the approach? boss: no. it's worked for years.

Zoom Background Says A Lot

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Zoom Background Says A Lot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #business, #consultant, #video background, #shelves, #sports trophies, #photo, #jesus, #believability, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: your video call background needs improvement. i'll fill your shelves with sports trophies, plus photos of you shaking hands with jesus. dilbert: who would believe i shook hands with jesus? dogbert: the same people who will believe you won lots of sports trophies.

Zoom Background Designer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Zoom Background Designer  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #video conference, #zoom, #video backdrop designer, #accurate, #single, #obvious, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert the video backdrop designer dogbert talking to laptop on table: the background of your video calls says a lot about you. for example, it's obvious you have no women in your life, and your knickknacks suggest you are a latent serial killer. frame switches to wally. wally: spookily accurate. dogbert: exactly. that's what we don't want.