Creepy Comic Strips - Page 1
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43 Results for Creepy
View 1 - 10 results for creepy comic strips. Discover the best "Creepy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday November 12,
2020
Yes Queen
Tags business, business people, sarcasm, value, appreciation, queen, devalue
Transcript
asok: alice, i want you to know that i hear you and i value you. alice: that's terrific maybe you could stop talking to me in that super creepy and condescending way. asok: yes, queen. alice: who broke you?
Monday February 04,
2019
Robot Has A Cyborg
Tags insults, Kids, office workers, robot, technology, smartphone
Transcript
Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.
Saturday January 26,
2019
Self Driving Car
Tags automobile driving, cars, intelligence, technology, creepy
Transcript
Dilbert: My self-driving car quit on me. Wally: You mean it broke down? Dilbert: No, I mean it left a note and drove away. Wally: Did you wax it enough? Dilbert: I tried, but it kept moaning in a creepy way.
Sunday August 19,
2018
Tags alice, Dilbert, Wally, chatbot, plumbing supply, website, sister
Transcript
Wally: I fell in love with a chatbot. We met on a plumbing supply website. I started innocently. I had a few questions about faucets. Next thing I knew, she was getting flirty. Now we chat for hours every night. Alice: That is the most pathetic thing I have ever heard you creepy loser. Dilbert: Does your chatbot have a sister?
Monday September 18,
2017
Helping The Boss Be Successful
Tags helpfulness, niceness, kindness
Transcript
Asok: How can I help you achieve your goals and be more successful? Boss: You could stop talking all creepy and weird. Asok: I thought I was being helpful. Boss: Go hate your job like everyone else.
Sunday August 06,
2017
Tags greed, scavenging, cannibal, furniture, energy, vibes, health
Transcript
Alice: My chair is broken. I need a new one. Boss: You can take Ted's chair. I fired him this morning. Alice: That feels icky. Boss: It's just a chair. Alice: Ted was a creepy underperformer. I don't want his loser energy on me. Boss: That's your only option unless I fire someone else today. Alice: Okay, give me an hour to do some back-stabbing and rumor-mongering. Boss: I'll just let that situation work itself out. Alice: Nice chair. Dilbert: Why did my fight-or-flight instinct just kick in?
Tuesday July 04,
2017
Immersive Vr Employee Is Creepy
Tags reality, virtual reality, vr, sanity, hallucination, fantasy, imagination, therapy, psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: We hired an immersive VR employee and it's freaking me out. I can only see him when I wear my VR goggles. I feel as if he's always watching me. Doctor: Sounds like you're crazy. I can fix that with a prescription cocktail that will turn you into an entirely new person. Kevin: Run.
Monday August 17,
2015
Dilbert Invents A Brain Stimulator
Tags work ethic, happiness, work, labor, employee, stimulation, boredom, interest, human resources, psychology, business
Transcript
Dilbert: My brain stimulator will keep me interested in your meetings, no matter how boring they are. Now I can enjoy work and get paid, too. It seems I have beaten the system. Catbert: He's enjoying what? Boss; Work. It's super creepy.
Sunday May 17,
2015
Tags flirting, romance, privacy, stalking, creepy, creeper, gestures, gifts, coworkers
Transcript
The New Employee. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. I bought you a book. Woman: Okay, weird. Who buys gifts for new co-workers? And how did you know this is my favorite author? Dilbert: I asked one of the network guys to check your browser history. Catbert assured me that employees have no right to privacy. I heard that women like it when men put thought into a gift. I hope you appreciate my romantic gesture. Wally: Did she make a romantic gesture back? Dilbert: I choose to interpret it that way.
Sunday April 12,
2015
Tags leadership, praise, admiration, anger, compliments
Transcript
Alice: What do you want now? Dilbert: Experts say leaders should surround themselves with people they admire and be generous with praise. Alice, I admire your hard work and intellect. Alice: Stop it! This is creepy! Dilbert: I admire your focus and your determination. Alice: Gaaa!!! Stop admiring me! My skin is crawling! Dilbert: I admire your honesty! Alice: Blech! Wally: Do you feel more like a leader now? Dilbert: Yes, in the sense that people hate me.


