Fat Man Comic Strips - Page 1
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1000 Results for Fat Man
View 1 - 10 results for fat man comic strips. Discover the best "Fat Man" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 20,
2020
Quarantine Wally
Tags #avoid, #business, #clean, #covid-19, #hazmat suit, #health & safety, #quarantine, #symptoms, #wash, #pandemic
Transcript
man in hazmat suit: you reported covid-19 symptoms, so we have to quarantine you. wally: i don't have symptoms. i just said i did to avoid a meeting. man in hazmat suit: well, you probably have it now. i haven't washed this hazmat suit in five months.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday August 19,
2020
Dilbert Is Sexist
Tags #insult, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #fire, #crazy, #gender, #true, #false, #anger, #face mask
Transcript
tina: i want you to fire dilbert because he said i might be nuts. he wouldn't say that to a man. boss: he said the same thing to me last week. tina yelling: it doesn't count if it's true!
Tuesday August 18,
2020
Social Media Poisoning
Tags #health, #medical, #doctor, #social media, #poison, #defensive, #angry, #self-control, #weight, #pounds, #shaming, #fat, #over reaction
Transcript
dilbert in doctor's office. dilbert: i think i have social media poisoning. it makes me feel defensive and angry all the time, but i can't quit. doctor: you've gained five pounds. dilbert yelling: you fat-shaming quack!
Friday June 19,
2020
Dilbert Doesn't Believe In Safety
Tags #employees, #office workers, #safety, #sarcasm, #team
Transcript
Tina: Ugh, Dilbert is on the project team? That guy doesn't believe in safety. Man: Just out of curiosity, what evidence of that extremely weird allegation have you seen? Tina: What evidence do you have that you exist? See? Anyone can do that.
Tuesday June 16,
2020
Dilbert Cares Not For Safety
Tags #argument, #office workers, #safety, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: ...And we can get that all installed in thirty days. Man: Why do you not care about safety? Dilbert: Literally everyone cares about safety. Man: Then why didn't you mention it? DIlbert: Blah, blah, safety. Happy? "Continued..."
Monday June 15,
2020
Real Data
Tags #decision, #office workers, #sarcasm, #dumb, #facts
Transcript
Man: We need to make decisions based on real data! Dilbert: Who do you imagine disagrees with that obvious statement? Man: Uh-oh. I just realized I'm dumb and never knew it. Dilbert: I hear it can sneak up on you.
Wednesday June 10,
2020
Hate Edits
Tags #criticism, #office workers, #sarcasm, #edit
Transcript
Dilbert: I didn't like your analysis, so I made some hate-edits. Man: What's a hate-edit? Dilbert: You'll see. Man: You changed "in my opinion" to "according to the squirrels in my skull." Dilbert: There you go.
Friday June 05,
2020
Believing Experts
Tags #debates, #Opinion, #expert, #facts, #current events, #Politics
Transcript
Man: Haha! You idiot! How dare you dis-agree with the foremost experts in this field! Dilbert: Here's a breaking story about those same experts being arrested today for falsifying data. In a sane world, this information would serve to modify your strong opinion. Man: That's not how any of this works.
Wednesday June 03,
2020
Bead Of Sweat
Tags #health & safety, #idea, #nervous, #office workers, #sickness, #virus, #paranoia, #pandemic
Transcript
Man: What do you think of my idea? Dilbert: To be honest, I didn't hear a word of it. I spent the whole time being worried about that bead of sweat on your forehead. Man: It's warm in here! Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be a thousand yards in that direction.
Wednesday May 27,
2020
Boss Is In A High Risk Group
Tags #criticism, #health & safety, #office workers, #sarcasm, #virus, #pandemic, #risk
Transcript
Carol: Are you worried about coronavirus because you're in a high-risk group? Boss: Why would I be in a high-risk group? Carol: Do you own a full-length mirror? Boss: No. They make me look fat.