Hours Worked Comic Strips - Page 1

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327 Results for Hours Worked

View 1 - 10 results for hours worked comic strips. Discover the best "Hours Worked" comics from Dilbert.com.

Job Requires Long Hours

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Job Requires Long Hours - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Ted Will Train You

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Ted Will Train You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, training, absence, coffee, helpful, problem, successful, sarcasm

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boss: ask ted to show you how to do his job functions before he leaves for his new job. panel changes to office building. dilbert: what if he isn't helpful? boss: then i'll fire you for failing. panel changes back in office: dilbert: do you see any problem with the approach? boss: no. it's worked for years.

Workplace Injuries

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Workplace Injuries - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, meeting, video call, workplace, injury, reduce, work from home, security, guard, hurt, back, steal, office equipment

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boss on video call. boss: i'm proud to announce we reduced workplace injuries by 76% this past year. voice from laptop: we all worked from home this year. shouldn't we have seen a 100% reduction? boss: our security guard kept hurting his back stealing office equipment.

Deep Fake Zoom

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Deep Fake Zoom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, video conference, zoom, call, deep fake, program, generic, employee, work, sarcasm, cell phone, laptop

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dilbert looking at phone on couch at home. dogbert: i thought you said you had a zoom call that would last for hours today. dilbert: i built a "deep fake" version of myself to take zoom calls and say generic employee stuff. next slide is boss in from of laptop on video call. boss: dilbert, do you have anything to add? dilbert: i don't know if i'm working hard or hardly working. har-har!

Alice Compliments Ted

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Alice Compliments Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, comparison, project, job, great, dread, foreboding, generous, trap, lull, sabotage, career, monster

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alice: you did a great job on your project ted. ted: thank you. alice: you are most welcome. ted: wait. why do i have a sense of dread and foreboding? it isn't like you to give out generous compliments. this feels like a trap. you're lulling me into a false sense of security. you plan to sabotage my career to make yourself look better by comparison. ted yelling: you monster! boss: what's this all about? alice thinking: that worked out.

Recurring Charges

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Recurring Charges - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, cancel, online, charges, information, automated phone system, contact, website, microphone

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dilbert at home: i'm going to try to cancel some recurring online charges today. wish me luck. dogbert: what resistance are you expecting? dilbert: obviously, they hide their contact information, so i allocated two hours to find the right phone number. it should take about an hour to navigate their automated phone system that will keep sending me to the wrong place. if i reach a human, he'll try to divert me to their website to cancel, which i already know won't work because... ...i won't be able to find my account in their system for reasons no one will ever be able to explain. and of course, their phone support person will be using a headset microphone that garbles his already mumbled words. dogbert: but if you stick with it, you will eventually succeed? dilbert: i don't know were you got that idea.

Dilbert Not On Mute

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Dilbert Not On Mute - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, meetings, video conference, zoom, time-wasting, fool, mute

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Dilbert on a video conference call and voices coming from laptop" We've been going for two hours, so let's wrap up... i have a new topic... dilbert: Gaaa!!! why is there always on time-wasting fool on every zoom call??? why? why? voice from laptop: dilbert, you're not on mute. dilbert: oh. did you hear my tv? i'll turn it down.

Cushion In Schedule

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Cushion In Schedule - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, weekend, work, deadline, due date, schedule, input, critical, liar, credibility, exaggerate

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dilbert: i worked all weekend to get this done for you by the deadline. boss: thanks, but i won't need it for another two weeks. dilbert: then...why did you tell me the deadline was today? boss: i built some cushion into the schedule. dilbert: you mean, you lied to me about the real deadline. in other words, you don't trust me, you are a liar, and i should never believe you again. boss: but you didn't miss the deadline! dilbert: okay, well, at least my input is critical to our success. boss: i might have exaggerated that.

No Raise In Years

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No Raise In Years - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, job, raise, nine, years, face mask, employment

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office worker: i've been working here for nine years, and you haven't given me a single raise! boss: i didn't even know you worked for me. obviously, you didn't do anything useful, or i would have noticed. office worker: well, in that case, i'm glad i didn't give my name.

Refusing Works

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Refusing Works - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, refuse, stupid, power, leash, head, sarcasm

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dilbert: yesterday i refused to do something i had been asked to do because it was stupid. and it worked out fine. wally: don't let the power go to your head. dilbert doing happy dance: i am off the leash! continued...