Meet Deadlines Comic Strips - Page 1

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

176 Results for Meet Deadlines

View 1 - 10 results for meet deadlines comic strips. Discover the best "Meet Deadlines" comics from Dilbert.com.

I Will Send You A List

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
I Will Send You A List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 30, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #target, #complicated, #detail, #list

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: and i plan to meet my targets by doing a variety of complicated things. boss: what kind of things? wally: i'll send you a detailed list. boss: what if you forget to send it? wally: with any luck, you'll forget you asked for it.

Mandatory Blockchain Class

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mandatory Blockchain Class - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 2020's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #technology, #class, #mandatory, #blockchain, #introductory, #experienced, #developer, #instructor, #phone call

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: you haven't completed the mandatory class on blockchain. dilbert: that's an introductory class. i'm already an experienced blockchain developer. boss: the class is mandatory. every developer needs to check the box. dilbert: just check the box for me. boss: only the instructor can do that. and i don't want to call him because he rambles on and on. dilbert looking distressed: you want me to take a two-day class so you won't have to make a phone call? boss: i knew you'd understand. dilbert: what if taking the class causes me to miss my deadlines? boss: no problem. i'll just cancel your bonus.

Meeting To Decide When To Meet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meeting To Decide When To Meet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #meeting, #schedule, #thursday, #berate

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i need everyone to come to the thursday meeting so we can decide when to schedule our next meeting. dilbert: why don't we just have the meeting on thursday? dilbert: see me later, so i can berate you for saying that. dilbert: do we need a meeting to schedule that?

Stay Home When Sick

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Stay Home When Sick - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 15, 2019's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #healthy, #sick, #sneeze, #infect, #deadlines

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: maybe you should stay home when you are sick. alice sneezing: honk! i will, but first i need to infect the rest of you so i'm not the only one missing deadlines. can you hold this for me? (passes off tissue to dilbert)

When Can You Meet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
When Can You Meet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meetings, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: when can you meet tomorrow? alice: anytime. dilbert: how about 2 pm? alice: no, that doesn't work. dilbert: i guess we're going to do this the hard way.

Wally's Reading Time

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Reading Time - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 27, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: wally, can we meet tomorrow at 8 am? wally: that's when i eat breakfast in the cafeteria. alice: how about 9 am? wally: that would bump into my bowel and reading time.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #avoidance, #irritation, #lunch, #office workers, #relationships, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: You should meet the new guy in marketing. You two would get along great. I'll set up a lunch. Dilbert: Why? Tina: Because he reminds me of you. Dilbert:That isn't a reason. Tina: Okay, he is free tomorrow for lunch. I'll tell him to meet you in the lobby. Dilbert: I still don't see why the three of us need to go to lunch. Tina: It's just the two of you. I'm busy tomorrow. Man: I hear you're a lot like me. Dilbert: Sadly, yes.

Meeting Robot's Son

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meeting Robot's Son - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 06, 2019's comic on:


Tags #family & parenting, #hungry, #Kids, #robot, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: I'd like you to meet my son. As you can see, he is half-human and half-machine. Dilbert: Does he talk? Robot: Only when he's hungry or he can't find his charger.

Boss Leads All The Way

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Leads All The Way - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 31, 2018's comic on:


Tags #business, #encouragement, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #trick, #deadline

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We'll all need to work around the clock to meet the launch schedule. I'll be leading you every step of the way! Now, don't hate me because I can lead you while I'm home asleep. That's not my fault.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #employee, #calendar, #week, #awkward, #problem, #schedule, #relative, #lunch, #sandwich

View Transcript

Transcript

Male Employee: Do you have an hour to meet next week? Dilbert: Let me check my calendar. Next week is not good. Male Employee: You don't have one hour of free time all week? Dilbert: Well, this is awkward. The problem isn't my schedule so much as your total lack of value relative to my alternatives. Male Employee: Maybe we could meet over lunch? Dilbert: I like to focus on my sandwich.