Pay Comic Strips - Page 1
Search Filters
Year
- 2023
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
326 Results for Pay
View 1 - 10 results for pay comic strips. Discover the best "Pay" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 05,
2021
Pay Not Keeping Up With Inflation
Saturday March 27,
2021
Cut Pay For No Commute
Tags business, technology, video call, commute, employment, wages, reduce, pocket, stealing, prison, innocent, laptop, coffee
Transcript
dilbert and boss on video call. boss: i've decided to reduce your pay because you no longer commute. when you pocket those savings, it is as if you are stealing from the company. dilbert: actually, it isn't like that at all. boss: everyone in prison says they're innocent too.
Sunday March 14,
2021
Loud Using Zoom
Tags business, technology, zoom, mortgage, loud, noise, calls, war, blackmail, surprise, laptop, imagine
Transcript
dogbert: can you please stop talking so loudly on your zoom calls?!!! dilbert at home in front of laptop: i'm sorry, but i pay the mortgage, and i have a right to make as much noise as i want in my own house. dogbert: oh, wow. did you really play the "mortgage card" on me? dogbert: this is war! wait until you see what i do in the background of your next zoom call. i don't want to ruin the surprise, but think of the number-one worst thing you can imagine me doing. are you picturing it in your mind? it's bad isn't it? now imagine at the same time i also start doing the second-worst thing you can imagine. dilbert: noooo!!!!
Tuesday January 12,
2021
The Moron Option
Tags business, technology, corporate rule, vendor, accounts receivable, 30 days, pay, payment, exception, moron
Transcript
dilbert: our corporate rule is that we won't do business with any vendor who does not give us at least 30 days to pay. dilbert: but we can get the same product for half the price if we go with the vendor who wants payment immediately. should we make an obvious exception here or be morons? boss: i think you're under-valuing the moron options.
Saturday January 02,
2021
Audit Blackmail
Tags business ethics, business, audit, software, blackmail, free, network, money, dollars
Transcript
dogbert: my audit of your company has uncovered a number of software vulnerabilities. for example, a blackmailer could take control of your network and make you pay a billion dollars to get it back. ceo: good work. what do we owe you? dogbert: the audit is free. i only did it to find ways to blackmail you.
Tuesday December 15,
2020
Ted Reimagined More
Tags managers & supervisors, business, employment, unnecessary, job, budget, sarcasm
Transcript
boss: when i say we need to reimagine your job, it means we no longer need anyone to do what you have been doing. ted: do you mind if i ask when you first realized that my job was totally unnecessary? boss: it was four years ago, but you seemed happy, and we had the budget to pay you, so...
Monday December 14,
2020
Reimagine Ted's Job
Tags boring, business, job, new, pay, projects, reimagine, technology, compensation
Transcript
boss: ted, we need to reimagine your job. ted: i hope that means you will replace the boring parts of my job with exciting new projects. boss: it doesn't mean that. boss: does it mean doing the same work for higher pay?
Saturday October 10,
2020
Asok Is Overpaid
Tags managers & supervisors, business, project, technology, time, pay, argue, math, face mask, salary
Transcript
asok: i finished my project in half the projected time. boss: that means i'm paying you twice as much as you deserve. asok: i don't think it means that at all. boss: you look dumb arguing with math.
Tuesday October 06,
2020
Height Advantage
Tags company, employement, fired, height, hiring, managers & supervisors, pay cut, short, tall, video conferencing, zoom
Transcript
boss video conferencing with carl: carl, i hired you because you are tall, but now it doesn't matter because everyone looks the same height on zoom. your height advantage has disappeared, so today will be your last day with the company. carl: maybe instead you could cut my pay to the same level as short people. boss: that just might work.
Thursday May 28,
2020
Wally Borrows Money
Tags danger, health & safety, money, office workers, social distancing
Transcript
Wally: I heard you are not practicing social distancing. Can I borrow some money? CEO: What does social distancing have to do with borrowing money? Wally: I like borrowing money when I might not have to pay it back.


