Project Managers Comic Strips - Page 1
1000 Results for Project Managers
View 1 - 10 results for project managers comic strips. Discover the best "Project Managers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share September 25, 2020's comic on:
dilbert: do you think karma is real? wally: nah. boss: i'd like you to meet the newest member of our team. his name is karma. dilbert: if you need me, i'll be hiding. karma: i hear one of you has been bad.
Share September 24, 2020's comic on:
tina tying on laptop computer: "no one on the project team could have foreseen that the problem that..." tina's soul: you are a lying piece of garbage. tina: who said that? tina's soul: it's your soul. we can't hang out anymore. tina: fine. you were slowing me down.
Share September 23, 2020's comic on:
tina: is it lying if i leave out important context from my project updates? dogbert: that's called "business lying" and it is totally acceptable. tina: but it makes me feel sick. dogbert: that's how you know you are doing it right.
Share September 22, 2020's comic on:
boss: when you write the project summary, make it seem as if we didn't make any mistakes. tina: you want me to lie? that would be a massive ethical violation. boss: no, no. i only want you to omit important context. tina: why does my stomach hurt?
Share September 21, 2020's comic on:
boss: i couldn't help noticing you are having a heated discussion. watch me use my conflict resolution skills to lower the temperature. okay, what were you idiots yammering about? tina: solid start.
Share September 20, 2020's comic on:
wally: i installed a silencer in our pointy-haired boss's face mask. now he's the only one who can hear himself talk, but he doesn't know it. here he comes. play along. boss has speech bubble with no words. boss's back is turned and has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh. okay. thanks. and i can do the same thing to the face mask of anyone else who bores me. dilbert has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh.
Share September 19, 2020's comic on:
boss: according to my employee tracker, you spent 45 minutes in stall four of the men's room today. wally: i thought you said the purpose of tracking us was to ensure social distancing. boss: i think you have to accept some responsibility for believing it.
Share September 18, 2020's comic on:
boss: we are adding a chip to your employee badges so we can track your social distancing. dilbert: that sounds like a convenient excuse to do something you've always wanted to do anyway. boss: that's probably a coincidence.
Share September 17, 2020's comic on:
catbert: it has come to our attention that many of the words we use at work are racist and often sexist. for example, we can no longer refer to the main power shut-off as a "master switch." dilbert: is that the one on the server rack? catbert: we call those "shelves" now.
Share September 16, 2020's comic on:
catbert: we added the following trick question to our interview process... do black lives matter? interviewee: yes, of course. catbert: say more about that. interviewee: i think all... catbert yelling and pointing: dismissed!