Skip Meeting Comic Strips - Page 1
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961 Results for Skip Meeting
View 1 - 10 results for skip meeting comic strips. Discover the best "Skip Meeting" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday November 24,
2021
90 Minute Meeting
Monday November 22,
2021
Meeting In Person
Tuesday September 14,
2021
Rotting In A Meeting
Friday July 09,
2021
New Loyal Customers
Tags #business, #meeting, #ceo, #woke, #advertising, #dollars, #loss, #quarter, #offend, #straight face, #botox, #annoying
Transcript
ceo: our strategy of being annoyingly woke in our ads caused us to have an eight billion dollar loss this quarter. but it was worth it because sometimes you have to offend some of your customers to make the others loyal. dilbert: how did you say that with a straight face? ceo: no one told you about botox?
Monday July 05,
2021
Racist Scapegoat
Tags #managers & supervisors, #business meeting, #hire, #racist, #racism, #woke gang, #human, #sacrifice, #attack, #scapegoat, #bloodlust
Transcript
boss: i hired a racist in case the woke gangs attack us and we need a human sacrifice. coworker: what? boss: when the wokies come for us, we'll throw this guy under the bus to satisfy their bloodlust. coworker yelling: i'm not a racist! boss: they won't know that.
Sunday July 04,
2021
Tina Misremembers
Tags #business, #meeting, #cancel, #communication, #remember, #text, #message, #confirm, #trigger, #cognitive dissonance, #absurd, #frogs, #hooves, #wrong, #liar
Transcript
Tina: why didn't you tell me you canceled the meeting?!! dilbert: i did. Tina: you absolutely did not. i would certainly remember if you did. dilbert: here are the text messages when i told you i canceled the meeting and you conformed. Alice in a daze. Dilbert: uh-oh. i seemed to have triggered cognitive dissonance. whatever you say next is likely to be an absurdity that allows you to be right when you are wrong. Tina: i told you frogs don't have hooves, but you insisted they did! admit you were wrong! i win you liar! dilbert thinking: this show never gets old.
Wednesday June 30,
2021
Video Lunch Meeting Rules
Tags #business, #meeting, #zoom lunch meeting, #zoom, #lunch, #beaver, #dam, #bubblewrap, #ugly, #eater, #video, #off, #on, #sarcasm, #microphone
Transcript
alice: welcome to our first zoom lunch meeting. if you chew louder than a beaver making a dam out of bubble wrap, please turn off your microphone. and if you are an ugly eater... voice from laptop: we get it. turn the video off.
Sunday June 27,
2021
Loser Detector
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #invention, #losers, #accurate, #detection, #pings, #backwards, #sarcasm
Transcript
in meeting room. dogbert: i invented a device that can detect losers. boss: how do i know if it's accurate? dogbert: point it at a know loser and see if it pings. boss pointing it at employees: boss: hey! it knows ted is a loser! ha ha ha!!! it says dilbert and alice are losers too! and carol and wally too! ha ha ha!!! this thing is totally accurate! dogbert: you're holding it backward. boss: how exactly does it detect losers? dogbert: they're the ones who hold it backward.
Wednesday June 16,
2021
Tina Is Late For Revenge
Tags #business, #office workers, #late, #meeting, #punctual, #three, #minutes, #plotting, #revenge, #sarcasm, #october
Transcript
dilbert: you're late. tina: how do you like it? you were three minutes late that one time last october. dilbert: and you've been plotting your revenge since then? tina: it isn't weird
Saturday June 12,
2021
Another Zoom Meeting
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #meetings, #zoom, #scheduled, #emptiness, #soul, #overeating, #Advice
Transcript
dilbert on zoom call with boss. boss: we're having another zoom meeting at 4 p.m. dilbert: what's the topic? boss: its about how i fill the deep emptiness of my soul by scheduling zoom meetings. dilbert: have you tried overeating? that seems to work for me.