Topper Versus Alice Comic Strips - Page 1

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View 1 - 10 results for topper versus alice comic strips. Discover the best "Topper Versus Alice" comics from Dilbert.com.

Compared To Alice

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Compared To Alice  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 04, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #comparision, #face mask, #good, #office workers, #punish, #sarcasm, #selfish, #tragic, #work

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alice: you did great work on this...which has the tragic effect of making my work look less good in comparison. dilbert: will you be punishing me for my good work? alice: yes, but think of it as you not being selfish.

Package Design

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 Package Design  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #vp of sales, #technology, #sales, #selling, #design, #proposal, #package, #jump, #roof, #crazy, #sarcasm, #face mask

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dilbert: i got feedback on the proposed package design. our vp of sales says if we go with this design, he will "jump off the roof." alice: is he crazy or just good at selling? dilbert: no way to tell.

Ted Needed To Know

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  Ted Needed To Know - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 2020's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #technology, #business, #email, #forward, #malice, #slander, #private, #know, #face maks

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alice: i forwarded your email to ted. Dilbert shaken: WHAT!!! i said bad things about ted! that was a private email to you! alice: he needed to know. dilbert yelling: he did not need to know!

Any Questions

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 Any Questions  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #company, #conclusion, #end, #face masks, #managers & supervisors, #meeting, #question, #vision

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boss: okay, that's all for today unless anyone has a question. alice, boss & dilbert thinking: please let it end. please let it end. please let it end. co-worker: what's the company vision? unison: GAAA!!!

Who Started The Rumor

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Who Started The Rumor  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2020's comic on:


Tags #accused, #business, #covid, #fired, #job, #managers & supervisors, #motive, #office workers, #pandemic, #racism, #replacement, #rumor, #unjust, #white supremacist

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boss, alice and dilbert wearing face masks. boss: i have been unjustly accused of being a white supremacist, and my boss just fired me for it. alice is the obvious choice to take my job, so i assume you will hear something on that soon. i wish i knew who had the motive to start that rumor and get me fired.

Credible Data

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Credible Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2020's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #credible, #data, #problem, #test, #good

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alice: i finished the data throughput tests, but the results are not credible because of a problem with the test. boss: does the non-credible data make us look good? alice: yes. boss: our name for that kind of data is "credible."

Great Idea

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Great Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 12, 2020's comic on:


Tags #boss, #idea, #office workers, #sarcasm, #trick, #truth, #evidence

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Boss: I have a great idea. Let's create a google document that we can all update. Dilbert: That is exactly the idea I suggested to you yesterday. Boss: You can't prove that. Dilbert: That was only true until I learned to wear a wire.

Better Fast Than Good

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Better Fast Than Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 11, 2020's comic on:


Tags #boss, #email, #office workers, #sadness, #sarcasm, #time, #truth

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Dilbert: I got your email, but I didn't have time to include your upgrades on my analysis. It's better to be timely than right because our boss can't judge the quality of our work, but he knows when it's late. Alice: Why is it that everything true is also sad? Dilbert: That's how the truth works.

Confident Wrong Guy

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Confident Wrong Guy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2020's comic on:


Tags #boss, #confidence, #employees, #insults, #obliviousness, #office workers, #sarcasm, #hire

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Boss: I hired a guy who is always wrong, yet he is inexplicably confident. Alice: Why? We already have one of you. Boss: I don't know what you meant by that. But I am confident it is wrong.

Alice Borrows Stapler

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Alice Borrows Stapler - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #office supplies, #face mask, #borrow, #stapler, #paper clip, #coronavirus, #germs

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Alice wearing face mask: can I borrow your stapler? Dilbert wearing face mask: not with your bare hands. but i can wrap it in plastic and leave a hole for the staples to come out. Alice: maybe you can just lend me a paper clip. dilbert: i'll throw it to you.