Confident Men Comic Strips - Page 1

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189 Results for Confident Men

View 1 - 10 results for confident men comic strips. Discover the best "Confident Men" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, confident men, phonies, interest, Opinion, relationships

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Woman: I like men who are confident in any situation. Dilbert: Within that subset of men, do you prefer the phonies or the ones who are too dumb to know when they shouldn't be confident? Dogbert: What went wrong this time? Dilbert: I showed interest in her opinion.

New Tv Ad

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New Tv Ad - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags argument, business ethics, marketing, men and women, office workers, relations between the sexes, accuse

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Dilbert: Ben, from marketing, is here to give us a preview of our new tv ad. Ben: The opening scene shows a bunch of men who are weak and stupid, failing to solve a common problem. Then a confident and strong woman enters and solves the problem with ease. Dilbert: Isn't that incredibly sexist? Ben: No, because only the men are weak and stupid. Dilbert: And that's not sexist? Ben: Why are you being so weak and stupid? You sound like a bigot. Dilbert: I'll be quiet now. Wally: As quickly as it began, the rebellion was quashed.

Company Pays Men More Than Women

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Company Pays Men More Than Women - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, business ethics, managers & supervisors, men and women, money, relations between the sexes, sex & gender, salary

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Boss: It has come to my attention that our company pays men more than women. I have been asked to correct that situation. Dilbert: You're going to cut the pay of the men, right? Boss: No, no, no. I'm only going to ask you to identify as a woman.

Men Are Stupid Pigs

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Men Are Stupid Pigs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, office workers, complaint, office, stupid, pigs, Men, specific, i.q., visayan warty

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tina: i have a complaint about the men in the office. catbert: all of them? tina: yes, they're all stupid pigs. catbert: can you be more specific? tina: okay, they're basically visayan warty pigs in the i.q. range of 20 to 40.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags test phase, meeting, desk, production phase, being smart, good feeling, confident, business

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Dilbert:you scheduled the end of the test phase after the start of the production phase. we're feeling confident. Dilbert: ist too bad that being smart doesn't come with some sort of good feeling like that.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags embarrassment, obliviousness, hired consultant, less confident, overconfident people, don't recognize mistakes, didn't know studies, feel like idiot

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Boss: I hired a consultant to teach us how to be less confident. Dilbert: Is that because research has shown that overconfident people don't recognize their own mistakes? Boss: Now I feel like an idiot because I didn't know about those studies. Dogbert: I did him first.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags algorithm, attraction, creative men, creativity is random, dating, free will, humans, illusion, moist robots, parties, shop around, short term relationsips, relationships

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Woman: Okay, what's going on here? Dilbert: I'm creative. Studies show that women prefer creative men for short-term relationships. Woman: That plant is random, not creative. Dilbert: Creativity is random. If creativity were anything but random, someone would have figured out the algorithm by now. I notice that your pupils are dilating. That's a sign of attraction. My plan is working. Free will is an illusion. Humans are nothing but moist robots. Just relax and let it happen. Woman: This is weird. I'm actually attracted to you now. Dilbert: Thanks, but I'm going to shop around. Woman: My world no longer makes sense! Dilbert: Walk it off.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, blind date, jabba, star wars, janet, dated, Men, trace, delicious, tonight

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Dilbert sits at a table in a restaurant with an enormous woman. Dilbert thinks, "I will NEVER go on another blind date." Dilbert says, "So, Jabba . . . Er . . . I mean, Janet, have you dated many other men?" Janet replies, "Yes, but they all disappeared without a trace. Incidentally, you look delicious tonight."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Men, Women, frolic, rain, payoff, huge, singing, romance, love

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The panel says, "The difference between men and women. (Well, one of them.)" Dilbert and a woman look out the window. The woman says, "It's raining!! Let's go frolic in the rain!!" Dilbert thinks, "Frolic?" Dilbert stands in the rain wearing a raincoat and hood. The woman dances in the puddles without a coat or shoes. Dilbert thinks, "This'd better have a huge payoff."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, helen, man, resume, requested, formula, calculate, ratio, height, baldness, Men, different, nights

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Man: I hope you'll date me now, Helen. I brought my resume as you requested. Helen: There's a little formula I use to calculate the ratio of your earnings potential to your height and baldness... Hmm... You pass. Of course, I'll still date other men too. Man: On different nights?