Doctor Comic Strips - Page 1
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Character
129 Results for Doctor
View 1 - 10 results for doctor comic strips. Discover the best "Doctor" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday June 06,
2019
Doctor Appointment
Tags business, doctor, office, office workers, medical advice, essential oil, attitude, kava
Transcript
carol: i have a doctor's appointment today. the boss: doctor? bah! the boss: all you need are some essential oils and a supplement or two. carol: has anyone ever survived your medical advice? the boss: some kava could fix your attitude problem.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday February 07,
2021
Dogbert Is Doctor Of Impossible
Tags boring, business, cure, diseases, doctor, fail, headache, ice-cold bath, impossible, improvement, medical, prescribe, sarcasm, treatments, health and wellnes
Transcript
dogbert: i'm dogbert, doctor of the impossible. boss: does that mean you cure diseases that are believed to be impossible to cure? dogbert: no, that sounds boring. i prescribe treatments that are impossible to follow. when you fail you don't get better. you'll think it's your own fault. boss: how does that help anyone but you? dogbert: hey, i'm not the one who brought it up. boss: you're giving me a headache. dogbert: to cure that, i suggest ice-cold baths every six minutes.
Thursday May 12,
2011
Tags annoyance, doctors' offices, medicines, whiny idiots, pill, doctor, exam room, office, treadmill, pass out, medical
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm sick of listening to whiny idiots. Do you have a pill for that? Doctor: I sure do! I took a handful of them this morning and I feel great in spite of your complaining! How funny would it be if I make you run on a treadmill until you pass out?
Wednesday August 31,
2011
Tags complaining, conversation, get mad, point out dumb, helpful, doctor, Dogbert, medical
Transcript
Dilbert: I wonder why people get mad when I point out how dumb they are. I'm just trying to be helpful. I don't want people going through life not knowing what the problem is. I'm kind of like a doctor. Dogbert: I stopped listening back at the house.
Saturday October 29,
2011
Tags doctors' offices, illness, bad case, wahtchamacallit, pills, doctors offcie, doctor, wicked hemorrhoids, feel like progress, medical
Transcript
Doctor: You've got a bad case of whatchamacallit. These pills won't fix your underlying problem, but they might give you a wicked case of hemorrhoids. And I can treat hemorrhoids, so that would feel like progress.
Friday March 16,
2012
Tags illness, plunging productivity, 8 year old boy, traylor, germs, doctor, allergies, gives to mom, medical
Transcript
CEO: Our plunging productivity is all because of an eight-year-old boy named Traylor. Traylor doesn't wash his hands, he brings home every virus and germ from school, and gives it to his mom, who brings it to work with her. Dilbert: Maybe you should see a doctor. Carol: It's just allergies!
Tuesday January 23,
1990
Tags doctor, Dilbert, sale, price, discount, cash, ten, days
Transcript
Dilbert sits on an examining table in a doctor's office. The doctor says, "Normally I'd give you six months to live." The physician continues, "But we're having a '50% off sale' today, so I'll give you a full year for the same price." Dilbert lies back on the table. The doctor says, "And you get an extra ten days if you pay cash!"
Wednesday January 24,
1990
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, arm chair, doctor, life, death, paint, house
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . And the doctor gave me just a year to live." Dilbert continues, "I'm sorry, little guy . . . I don't know how you'll manage without me." Dogbert asks, "Would it be too much trouble to paint the house before you go?"
Wednesday July 11,
1990
Tags Dilbert, supervisor, career, path, secetary, years, doctor, expect, hard work
Transcript
Dilbert says to a man at a desk, "As your new supervisor, I want to discuss your career path." Dilbert asks, "You're a secretary now, but what do you want to be in two years?" The man replies, "A famous actor . . . Or maybe a doctor." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . I don't think I can help you here . . ." The man replies, "Oh, right, but you'll expect me to work hard for you."
Wednesday August 08,
1990
Tags doctor, doctor fishlips, Dilbert, police, bold, escape, prison, institutions
Transcript
Doctor Fishlips: Hello, Dilbert, this is Doctor Fishlips. I was wondering if you could come back for some X-rays. Dilbert: X-rays? Is that standard procedure a week after an appendectomy? Doctor Fishlips: A patient from the prison is missing... I'm told this isn't the first time, "Tiny Tom," has tried a bold escape,

