Fierce Paper Jam Comic Strips - Page 1

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351 Results for Fierce Paper Jam

View 1 - 10 results for fierce paper jam comic strips. Discover the best "Fierce Paper Jam" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags copier repair guy, egg carton, fierce paper jam, flirting, good looking, joy

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Carol says on the telephone, "Send a copier repair guy. And make sure he's good-looking." Carol continues, "Because I live in a big tin can and I work in an egg carton. Flirting is the only joy I have." Carol continues, "Nothing's wrong with the copier yet, but I feel a fierce paper jam coming on."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags copy machine, paper jam, poltergeist, scary, horror, upside down, legs sticking up, high heels, kick legs, yell, afterworld, arms, flail, hold out arm

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Tina says, "I can almost reach the paper jam, but a poltergeist is trying to drag me to the afterworld." Tina says, "Maybe I can blind him with the toner cartridge. Ha ha! Take that! And that!" Tina says, "Gaaa!!! I can't feel my arms!" Dilbert says, "I only have one."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

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I'm the editor of the department newsletter. That makes you my cub reporter. "Cub reporter??? I have an engineering degree from the India Institute of Technology - the most challenging university on the planet." "That'll come in handy during the copying phase. We get some fierce paper jams."

Fierce Employees Wanted

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Fierce Employees Wanted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, confusion, ferocity, fierce, hiring, interview, job application, job interview

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Boss: We're looking for employees who are fierce! Applicant: Should I punch you or something? I don't know how to play this. Boss: Try acting normal, but angrier.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags appearences, big cubicle, loose weight, project leader, status system, toilet paper holder, wider cubicle

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Boss: Congratulations! I'm naming you project leader. As such, you are entitled to a cubicle that is three inches wider than standard. Dilbert: I like the one I have. Boss: You don't have a choice. It is critical that we maintain the integrity of the status system. Otherwise our CEO will look like a jerk for having a private bathroom with a trained falcon as a toilet paper holder. Dilbert: Fine. Where's my larger cubicle? Boss: Here's the awkward part. We don't have one. I need you to lose weight until it looks as if your cubicle is larger. Dilbert: And if I don't? Boss: The falcon needs an assistant.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, writing, policeman, legal, size, paper, bribe

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Dilbert sits at a desk writing a letter. Dogbert asks, "Who are you writing to?" Dilbert replies, "My uncle Max, the policeman." Dogbert says, "You can't write to a cop on regular size paper! You have to use legal size paper!" Dilbert says, "Don't panic." Dogbert says, "I get it -- he looks the other way for family members." Dilbert says as he puts money in the envelope, "I send a bribe."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, secretary, department, image, problem, crush, paper clip, Dogbert

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A man asks Dilbert, "How's the new secretary for the department working out?" Dilbert replies, "I think he's having a self-image problem." The secretary sits at his desk and says, "Sure, I'm a secretary, but watch me crush this paper clip!!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, school, self-service, gas, station, attendants, teaching, section, refolding, maps, frustrating, paper cuts, minor, panic, sweat the room

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Dilbert sits at his desk and says to Dogbert, "I heard you closed your school for self-service gas station attendants." Dogbert says, "It didn't work out." Dogbert continues, "I was teaching the section on refolding maps . . . Frustrations were high . . . At first, the paper cuts were minor, but panic swept the room." Dilbert asks, "Well, how bad could . . ." Dogbert says, "They're all dead . . ."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, paper, plastic, bag, recylced, short, sighted, planet, destroying, conservation

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Dilbert stands at the supermarket register. The clerk asks, "Paper or plastic bag?" The checker continues, "Paper that can be recycled . . . Or an evil, selfish, short-sighted, planet-destroying, stupid plastic bag?!!" Dilbert answers, "Plastic." The checker says, "Good. That's all we have."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, access, news, personal, computer, wrong, paper, article, newspaper, picture

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Dilbert says to Wally, "I just read that in a few years you will be able to access all of the news and information of the world from your personal computer." Dilbert continues, "You probably saw the same article in today's paper." Wally replies, "I don't read a paper." Dilbert thinks as he walks away, "What's wrong with this picture?"