Annual Budget Comic Strips - Page 10
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343 Results for Annual Budget
View 91 - 100 results for annual budget comic strips. Discover the best "Annual Budget" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday September 13,
1998
Tags annual inspirational talk, work hard, competition, feel afraid, quality of lives, too afraid, management incompetetnce
Transcript
The Boss stands in casual clothes and says, "It's time for my annual inspirational talk." The Boss says, "We must work twice as hard, or the competition will crush us!" Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit in front of the Boss as he continues, "I want you to feel afraid twenty-four hours a day." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: wouldn't hat lower the quality of our lives?" Wally says, "Seems like it might." Wally continues, "I'm too afraid to work here now. I wonder if our competitor's are hiring?" Alice raises her hand and asks, "Question: should we continue to be afraid of our own management's incompetence?" The Boss replies, "Let's compromise. I'll agree to cut the meeting short if you'll all agree to feel worse in some way." The Boss leaves the meeting and thinks, "No I remember why I only inspire them once a year."
Thursday January 20,
2000
Tags dogcart investments, 1% annual fee, invest money, certified financial planner, make money
Transcript
Dogbert investments: Dogbert and the boss are sitting in a meeting. Dogbert says to the boss: "For a 1% annual fee I will invest your money with a certified financial planner." Dogbert says: "He'll charge 1% per year to put your money in mutual funds that charge 1% per year." The boss asks: "Will I make any money?" Dogbert answers: " I don't see you doing any of the work."
Tuesday August 15,
2000
Tags disaster recovery plan, help! help!, hope to have budget
Transcript
Alice says, "Our disaster recovery plan goes something like this..." Alice points to a picture of a man screaming "Help! Help!" Alice continues, "Someday we hope to have a budget."
Wednesday September 27,
2000
Tags forty million dollars, needs approval, over budget, whose side?
Transcript
Dilbert holds out a slip of paper to his Boss and says, "This needs your approval." The Boss looks at the piece of paper and Dilbert continues, "The company will save forty million dollars but you'll be ten thousand over budget." Dilbert says, "And before you ask, no it won't work the other way around." The Boss says, "Whose side are you on?"
Thursday September 28,
2000
Tags show plan, budget, resources, weakness
Transcript
The Boss sits at his desk and Dilbert says, "I'm sure your boss will increase the budget if you show him my plan." The Boss throws up his arms and says, "I just asked him for something else. I can't keep asking him for resources!" Dilbert asks, "So...you think that doing your job is a sign of weakness?" The Boss points at Dilbert and says, "Look what it did to you."
Tuesday May 29,
2001
Tags incredulous ed, budget numbers, request, coworker, budget manager, hard time, over reacts, ed, new hire
Transcript
Caption reads: "Incredulous Ed." Alice approaches Ed and asks, "Ed, do you have the latest budget numbers?" Ed looks up at Alice, squinting his eyes and gesturing, "Budget??? What is a 'budget' and why on earth would I have one?" Alice replies, "Because you're the budget manager." Ed hands her a piece of paper and says, "Here you go."
Monday October 22,
2001
Tags explain charge, budget season, trolls
Transcript
The Boss hands Dilbert a piece of paper and says, "Ask the trolls in accounting to explain this charge." Dilbert responds, "Gaa!" Dilbert says, "Please don't make me talk to those trolls during budget season!" A headless man walks out of the accounting department. The troll standing in the doorway says, "Next."
Tuesday October 23,
2001
Tags accounting trolls, explination, budget season, spit on data, 95% spit, finance trolls, underground, beneath the earth
Transcript
Headline: Accounting Trolls. Dilbert hands the trolls a piece of paper and says, "I need an explanation for these numbers." A troll responds, "This is budget season so I will spit on your data and send you away." Dilbert says, "That doesn't sound too bad." While one troll accumulates his spit, the other replies, "Our bodies are 95% made of spit."
Thursday December 20,
2001
Tags another cubicle, office moving budget, transfer to elbonia, relocation budget, budget is shot, mail yourself home
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "I want to move you to another cubicle but my office moving budget is shot." The Boss continues, "So I'm going to transfer you to Elbonia and then back so I can use the relocation budget." An Elbonian is on the phone. He relays a message to Dilbert: "He says the relocation budget is shot but you can mail yourself home."
Saturday February 16,
2002
Tags trip cancelled, travel budget, contact centers, training, ignorance
Transcript
As Dilbert is walking out of the office, The Boss says to him, "Your trip is canceled." The Boss continues, "We used up the travel budget renaming our call centers to 'contact centers.'" Dilbert responds, "But I need this training." The Boss replies, "Isn't that another way of saying you're ignorant?"