E Mail Comic Strips - Page 10
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Character
305 Results for E Mail
View 91 - 100 results for e-mail comic strips. Discover the best "E Mail" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday February 07,
2004
Tags send threatening emails, train new guy, easily downsize later, boss threatens alice, job security, male, female, training, alices bad advice
Transcript
The Boss: "Alice, I want you to train Ned to do everything you do." "Don't worry that it will make you redundant more easily downsizeable." Alice: "I like to start each day by sending threatening e-mail to the board of directors."
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Friday May 21,
2004
Tags email storage, server, document
Transcript
The Boss: You've exceeded your e-mail storage allocation on the server again. Alice: Thats because I od real work as opposed to walking around with a piece of paper. The boss: Its not a piece of paper: its a document! Alice: I can't hear you over the ousted of my real work.
Saturday June 12,
2004
Tags flaming #$%!!?, email personlaoty, really time preson, miserable clump, decaying compost
Transcript
"Tina, why did you call me a flaming #%!!?" "I'm so sorry." "That was my e-mail personality. My real-time personality is kind and gentle." "Oh. Okay." "Never speak to me again, you miserable clump of decaying compost!"
Thursday August 05,
2004
Tags voice mailbox, spam filter, rejects email, ear wax, grid
Transcript
Wally: "My voice mailbox is full, and my spam filter rejects all incoming e-mail." "As soon as I build up a good load of ear wax, I'll be off the grid." The Boss: "Wally, we need to talk." "EH?"
Wednesday November 24,
2004
Tags email, face on cows butt, morale, objects, off color jokes, photoshopped
Transcript
The boss: "Alice, you've ben accused of forwarding off-color jokes by e-mail." The Boss: "Do you object to the increase in morale or the nickel it cost the company so far?" "I object to my face being photoshopped to a cow's butt." Alice: "You object to art?"
Thursday November 25,
2004
Tags off color email, 75 poeple, thought funny, one compalined, punished, sensible, punish complainer
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert: "I understand that you forwarded an off-color e-mail to many people." "Seventy-Five people thought it was funny but one person complained, so you must be punished." "Wouldn't it make more sense to punish the freak who complained?" "Do I look sensible?"
Saturday November 27,
2004
Tags complain, joke, human rsources, psychologically damaged, empty shell, always been, hungry
Transcript
"Wally, did you complain to human resources about my off-color e-mail joke?" "Yes. I was psycologically damaged by your mirth. Now I'm an empty shell of a man." "You've ALWAYS been an empty shell of a man!!!" "This is making me hungry."
Saturday December 18,
2004
Tags submit, resume, misguided optimism, human will see resume, email parents
Transcript
Click Submit" to post your resume on the jobs web site." "Now sit back and enjoy the misguided optimism that someday a human being will see it." "Be sure to tell your parents that you looked for a job today." "I'll e-mail them."
Sunday June 06,
1999
Tags email two copies, fax, green paper, email, files, hard copy, internet, motivation gone, losing consciousness, lazy employees, technology
Transcript
Dilbert stands at the boss' desk. The boss says, "e-mail two copies to me when you're done." Dilbert says, "Two copies? It's e0mail." The boss says, "So?" Dilbert says, "Never mind. I'll e-mail two copies." The boss says, "and fax a copy in green paper for my files." Dilbert says, "Green? It's a fax!" The boss walks Dilbert out of his office and says, "And bring me a hard copy of the internet so I can do some serious surfing." Dilbert begins to faint in the doorway. Dilbert thinks, "Motivation.... gonve.. losing consciousness.." Dilber joins the pile of passed out employess by the boss' door. The boss thinks, "How did I end up with all the lazy employees?"
Sunday August 15,
1999
Tags pointy hired boss, phone, email, pager, electronic attempts, ruin productivity, send in ground trrops, return some calls
Transcript
Carol shows up in Dilbert's cubicle wearing a backpack and holding a staff. Carol says, "The pointy-haired boss wants to see you." Carol says, "He tried to reach you by phone, e-mail and pager." Carol says, "But you resisted his electronic attempts to ruin your productivity." Carol says, "so he decided to send in the ground troops." Carol pionts the staff at Dilbert and says, "Don't make me use this!" Dilbert stand in the boss' office. the boss says, "Could you wait outside while I return some phone calls?" Wally and Alice stand in line. Wally says, "Get to the back of the line." Dilbert stands behind three random people. Dilbert says, "Does everyone want to have a conversation?" The man in front of Dilbert says, "I have a magazine."


