Surpasses Last Remnets Comic Strips - Page 10

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319 Results for Surpasses Last Remnets

View 91 - 100 results for surpasses last remnets comic strips. Discover the best "Surpasses Last Remnets" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 1994's comic on:


Tags #lunch date, #rejction, #says she's dead, #seeing an illusion

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Tina: Lunch? With you? I'd love to but...uh... Tina: Im clinically dead, what you see are merely the last involuntary spasms before I stiffen. Dilbert: I have a hand truck. Tina: this was a very bad idea.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #bad schdeuling, #careless, #company cares, #last tuesday, #long hours, #missed out, #stress on workers, #stress redcution expert, #stressful, #talk at lunch, #too late

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"The company cares deeply about the effects of long hours and stress on workers." "So they're paying nearly $200 to have an expert on stress-reduction give a talk during lunch." "Just when you think they don't care, something like this comes along." "It's scheduled for lst Tuesday."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 1994's comic on:


Tags #boot camp, #conquer the earth, #genetic mutations, #half man, #sea monkeys, #half cucumber

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"What are you planting?" "I'm growing an army of genetic mutants to do my bidding." "Half man, half giant cucumber, these unthinking brutes will help me conquer the Earth!" "Didn't you try this with sea monkeys last year?" "None of them survived boot camp."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 04, 1994's comic on:


Tags #coffeee iv, #exercise, #given up sleep, #nutrition, #intravenous, #caffeine, #main line java, #health

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Dilbert: Hows the job going, Anne? Anne: Musch better, now that Ive given up sleep, exercise and nutrition in favor of coffee. Dilbert: Any adverse effects? Anne: This is the aorta of the last person who asked me that.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 1994's comic on:


Tags #total quality method, #bullrush award, #honesty award

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "Describe how you used 'total quality' methods on your last project. We're applying for the Millard Bullrush Quality Award." Dilbert says, "You know I didn't use 'total quality.' I'd have to lie." The Boss responds, "Sadly, Millard passed away before he could invent the Millard Bullrush 'Honesty' Award."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 30, 1995's comic on:


Tags #built a spreadsheet, #relative qualities, #twenty percent, #stop dating, #wrong formula, #higher math skills, #error intentional, #batch of flowers

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Liz sits at her computer and Dilbert looks over her shoulder. Liz says, "I built a spreadsheet to compare our relative qualities. I'm afraid I'm twenty percent too good for you. We must stop dating." Dilbert points at the screen and says, "NO! Look, Liz, you have the wrong formula in this column! That must mean I have higher math skills than you! We're almost even!" After Dilbert leaves, Liz sits at her computer and Dogbert sits on her printer. Dogbert says to Liz, "You left that error in there intentionally." Liz answers, "My last batch of flowers is wilting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1995's comic on:


Tags #bad mouthing, #last guy, #slimy, #brain, #files, #fleas skull, #alice, #Wally

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Dilbert, Alice and Wally sit at a conference table. Alice says, "I'd like to kick-off the project with the traditional bad-mouthing of the guy who worked on this before." Alice yells, "He's so slimy that slugs pour salt on HIM. His brain would rattle in a flea's skull!" Alice turns to Wally and says, "Oh, and I'll need your files." Wally answers angrily, "Fleas don't have 'skulls!!'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 1995's comic on:


Tags #sitting for boss, #prodcutivity, #efficiency, #queen alice

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Wally peers into Dilbert's cubicle and yells, "Alice is sitting in for the boss!" Dilbert stands up, raises both hands in the air and shouts, "Productivity at last!!!" Wally yells, "Efficiency! Yes!!" Inside the cubicle, Wally says, "As long as she doesn't get an attitude . . ." Alice stands outside the cubicle with a crown on her head and a wand in her hand. Someone is bowing in front of her.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 23, 1995's comic on:


Tags #ousource, #functions, #knowing, #not good ta

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "The company has decided to outsource all of the functions that we're not any good at." Dilbert, Wally and Alice throw their arms up in excitement and shout, "Yippee! Yay!" Wally asks the Boss, "When's your last day?" Alice points at him and says, "Uh-oh . . . They're not good at knowing what they're not good at . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 29, 1995's comic on:


Tags #network connection, #technology have not, #global economy, #french fry, #electronic mail, #snork

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Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a table eating lunch. Wally asks, "Alice, did you hear that Dilbert's network connection isn't working?" Alice says, "Uh-oh." Wally continues, "He is what we call a technology 'have not.' His competitiveness in the global economy will last as long as this french fry." Alice says, "So sad." As Wally gulps the french fry, Alice says to Dilbert, "After lunch, I'm going to use something called 'electronic mail.' You can watch if you promise not to touch anything." Dilbert looks angry.