Elbonians Comic Strips - Page 10

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155 Results for Elbonians

View 91 - 100 results for elbonians comic strips. Discover the best "Elbonians" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags landing, hard landing, no oparachute, mud, elbonia, glasses, suitcase, jumped, plane

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Wally: I hate landing in Elbonia. "Whump!!!" wally: "Hi. I'm from America and I'm hree to help."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags america, arrogance, elbonians, end of time, fight you, fix problems, what we do

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In Elbonia Wally: "I'm from America and I'm here to fix all of your problems." Elbonians: "Your arrogance is offensive. We will form an armed resistance and right you to the end of time!" Wally: "Um... Why?" Elbonians: "It's just something we do."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone network, illegal compnent, bribe, nuclear weapon, add flavor

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"Your bid to build our cell phone network is the lowest by far." "But I'd feel more comfortable if it had an illegal component." "Like a bribe? Or helping you build a nuclear weapon?" "Yes, just something to add flavor."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags elbonians, demanding bribes, overpaid consultants, legal, won't get caught

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"The Elbonians are demanding bribes, or else they won't do business with us." "Hire them as overpaid consultants and don't ask them for anything. That way, it's all legal." "And by legal you mean won't get caught?" "Po-tay-to, po-tah-to."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags must bride, elbonians, nuclear weapon, microwave instead, persian rugs

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Dilbert: The Elbonians won't do business with my company unless we bribe them. Dogbert: offer to give them plans for building a nuclear weapon, Then give them plans to build microwave ovens instead. Dilbert: would that work? Dogbert: why do you think our garage is full of persona rugs?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meals on flight, cannibals, elbonian airlines

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"Are there meals on this flight?" "Yes, if you're a cannibal." Elbonia Airlines "That is not funny. After this flight, I'm going to complain to your supervisor." "Can you put me next to the plump guy?" "Sure. He's in B8."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags return frisbee, doesn't fly, software cd, total idiot, users manual, poorly written

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"I'd like to return this Frisbee (TM). It doesn't fly right." "This is a software CD. Only a total idiot would think it was a Frisbee (TM)." "In my defense, the user's manual was poorly written." "Plus you're a total idiot."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags outsourcing, language, translation, trade off, cheap, money

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My Elbonian factory can manufacture your product for pennies. "Is there any downside?" "Minor translation issues." "They either said 'plastic' or 'the spleen of a pig-footed bandicoot.'" "We don't have any plastic." SPLEENS

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags outsourcing, language, time zone, time, fatigue, confusion

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"After seeing the Elbonian mp3 player prototype I scheduled a conference call." "Because of the time difference, the call was at 3 AM. I was groggy and they barely speak any English, but I think we got everything worked out." "He was right. It does look better with the speakers."

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"If you hire me as your lobbyist I will convince Switzerland to attack Elbonia." $ "When the war begins, your sales of Kevlar Lederhosen will skyrocket!" "It's not as bad as it sounds. Elbonians believe that if they die fighting a neutral country, their souls get candy."