Interview Comic Strips - Page 10
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125 Results for Interview
View 91 - 100 results for interview comic strips. Discover the best "Interview" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday March 21,
2013
Tags engineering experince, job interview, no friends, social influence, social media score
Transcript
The Boss; Your engineering looks great, but your social media score is nearly zero. You have no friends , no followers, and no social influence whatsoever. Man: because I four on my work! The Boss: No, Im pretty sure you're dead.
Sunday May 12,
2013
Tags interviews, mental health, creative, adhd, dyslexia, bipolar, schizophrenia, creativity, normal is boring, turning tables, job interview
Transcript
Boss: I'm looking for an employee who is creative. Interviewee: That's me. I have ADHD and dylsexia. I'm also bipolar and schizophrenic. Dilbert: Checking the Internet... Well... that's surprising. Each of his conditions is highly correlated with creativity. Interviewee: Are you a normal? Boss: I... think so. Interviewee: Wow. I feel sorry for you. It must be hard going through life without any creativity. Boss: What's happening here? Dilbert: It might be some sort of creative thing.
Saturday June 01,
2013
Tags earring, headphones, interviews, self comscious, snobbishness, startup culture, self conscious, hipster, earing
Transcript
Interview at a start-up Interviewer: We only hire people who fit into our awesome start-up culture. Dilbert: No problem. I can be a self-conscious hipster if you think that's what keeps the lights on. Interviewer: I kind of do. Dilbert: What would I need besides an earring and headphones?
Sunday June 16,
2013
Tags interviews, lying, job interview, exaggerate credntials, more effective, business skill, misleading, convince customers, prodcuts, dupe some idiot, learn tech skills, honesty, hr, send offer, liar
Transcript
Dilbert: You look good on paper, but how do I know you aren't lying about your skills? Interviewee: You should hope I am lying. Studies show that people who exaggerate their credentials tend to be more effective once hired. That's because misleading people is a valuable business skill. For example, I might need to convince our customers that our products are better than the competition. Or I might need to dupe some idiot into leaving my cubicle so I can concentrate. Anyone can learn technical skills, but lying is an art form. Dilbert: He doesn't have an honest bone in his body. Boss: Perfect. I'll tell Human Resources to send him an offer.
Thursday September 05,
2013
Tags embarrassment, internet & world wide web, interviews, resume, old way, job interview, data online data, ew, disgust, walked out
Transcript
Boss: I don't need to see your resume. That's the old way of hiring. Now we use data from the Internet to see what you've been up to lately. Ew. Applicant: I'll show myself out. Boss: You'll understand if I don't shake your hand.
Wednesday April 16,
2014
Tags interviews, loneliness, accomplishments, job interview, hnesty, wrong motives, employment, make a difference, catatonic
Transcript
Boss: Describe your biggest accomplishment from your last job. Interviewee: I made some phone calls and stuff. I think I made a difference. Boss: Do you want this job? Interviewee: Nah. Just lonely.
Thursday April 17,
2014
Tags interviews, human resources, random statements, ostriches eye, bigger than brain, randomness, confession, job interview, approved questions, business
Transcript
Boss: I'm only allowed to ask interview questions that have been approved by Human Resources. And they haven't approved any yet. So all I can do is make random statements. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. Interviewee: So is mine!
Tuesday May 06,
2014
Tags charitable organizations, corporate charity, deception, no boss fooled, teaching interview techniques, trained umemployed, work ethic, job skill
Transcript
Wally: Last week, I did my corporate charity work by teaching unemployed people how to interview for jobs. Boss: Don't they also need job skills? Wally: Nah. I taught them how to look busy. Boss: No boss will be fooled by that. Wally: Do you believe I trained unemployed people last week?
Thursday May 08,
2014
Tags personnel officers, hr approval, enjoying pain, new rule, interview qiuestions, awkward feelings, cat, desk, laughing at boss, animals
Transcript
Boss; Interviews are getting awkward because of the new rule that human resources has to approve all questions. And you haven't approved any yet. Catbert: Heh heh heh heh heh heh! Boss: Stop enjoying my pain! Catbert: Stop making it so enjoyable!
Tuesday June 24,
2014
Tags interviews, job interview, spare time, questions, visit orphanges, back rubs, babies, practiced question
Transcript
JOB INTERVIEW Boss: So... what do you like to do in your spare time? Interviewee: Um... I visit orphanages and give back rubs to babies. Boss: Maybe you should have practiced for that question. Interviewee: And I bike there because I'm so green.


