Launch Window Comic Strips - Page 10

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125 Results for Launch Window

View 91 - 100 results for launch window comic strips. Discover the best "Launch Window" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #thrown out window, #press charges, #security, #gunning for job, #hire for yacht, #policeman

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Dilbert says, "My CEO threw me through a fifth-floor window. I'd like to press charges." A policeman says, "Your CEO? Do you think he would hire me to do security on his yacht?" Dilbert says, "No." The policeman says, "Would he hire me if I club you with this stick-thing?" Dilbert says, "Maybe."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #escape justice, #support group, #thrown out wondow, #injured, #casts, #bandages

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Dilbert says, "I need to find a support group for people who have my same problem." Dilbert says, "Type 'thrown out of a fifth floor window by a CEO who will escape justice.'" A man says, "look who doesn't have a broken leg. Do you think you're better than us?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #court room, #judge, #lawyer, #ceo, #witness, #defendant, #die die die, #admits guilt, #first question, #legal

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Dogbert says, "Where were you on the day that Dilbert was pushed out of your office window?" The CEO says, "I was directly behind him, in this position, yelling 'die, die, die!'" The CEO says, "The first question is just practice, right?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #presentation, #testing, #recommendation, #pain, #angry, #screaming, #ridicule

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Dilbert says, "The results of out beta testing are in." Dilbert says, "Our user interface triggered wide-spread despondency and self-mutilation." Dilbert says, "Obviously we'll need to delay our launch for the public good." The boss says, "When did you become a communist?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assignment, #job, #work, #scheme, #guessing, #cruel, #mean, #business

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The boss says, "Ted, your new responsibility is to keep the pigeons from defiling our ledges." Ted says, "Are you hoping this awful assignment will cause me to quit?" The boss says, "Not at all." Ted says, "Are you hoping I'll fall out a window?" The boss says, "Maybe you should stop guessing now,"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet, #toolbar, #browser, #download, #cubicle, #important, #technology

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The Boss says, "Whenever my browswer asks me if I want to install a toolbar, I'm afraid to say no." The Boss says, "Now my browser window is only one inch tall." The Boss says, "If you see anything important on the Internet, could you write it down for me?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #public relations, #statue of liberty, #destroy, #new york harbor, #weapon demo, #remorse, #fake, #glasses, #fake tears, #water, #flood

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Dogbert the public relations consultant Dogbert says, "The public won't forgive you until you fake some remorse." Dogbert says, "These glasses have a hose that leads to a pumping station and a huge reservoir of fake tears." CEO says, "If we have another press conference, we should crack open a window."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #book deal, #ghost writer, #dog, #publishing, #first draft, #quotes, #knife, #dying, #dead, #wave hand, #animals

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Dogbert Publishing Dogbert says, "I'm assigning a ghost writer to tighten up your first draft." Dogbert says, "Technically, he's not a ghost yet. He's just a guy who lost a knife fight." Asok says, "How long do I have to wait?" Dogbert says, "If you're in a hurry, steer him toward the window."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #website, #revamp, #launch, #technology, #crash, #success, #failure

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Dilbert says, "We launched our revamped website today." Dilbert says, "All of the technology we used is already obsolete and every vendor we hired is out of business." Dilbert says, "?And it just crashed." Dilbert says, "I miss the days when we had brief windows of success."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blinds, #co workers, #cubilce, #screen glare, #sunlight, #vampire, #window coverings, #share office

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Dilbert: why do you keep closing the blinds? Mordac: Screen glare? GAAAA!!! Dilbert: Screen glare. Alice: don't care.