Makes Me Unhappy Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

361 Results for Makes Me Unhappy

View 91 - 100 results for makes me unhappy comic strips. Discover the best "Makes Me Unhappy" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bill agtes, #bill gates, #competition keeper, #infrared, #linus rules, #linux box, #missiles, #sent email, #visit mom, #dilberts mother

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert's mom and Dilbert sit on the couch in Dilbert's living room. Dilbert's mom says, "...I'm going to infrared from the keyboard to my "linux" box." She has a keyboard on her lap. Dilbert says, "Nice mom" Dilbert's mom makes a fist and says, "I just sent a flaming e-mail to Bill gates, saying "Linux rules!" Dilbert says, "you what?" Bill gates sits in captians chair in a military looking facility. Bill says, "Launch the competitionkeeper missiles."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #peggy pr dircetor, #press release, #technical accuracy, #trained squirrel, #run on sentences, #transparent lies, #spelling grammar, #errors, #criticism stronger

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss and a woman approach Dilbert. The Boss says, "Dilbert, this is Peggy the P.R. Director." The Boss continues, "I want you to review her press release for technical accuracy." Peggy presents a document to Dilbert. Dilbert sits and reads it. Peggy watches his reaction. Dilbert asks, "Who wrote this? A trained squirrel?" He continues, "I don't know where to begin." Peggy gets angry as Dilbert takes a pen to the press release. Dilbert says, "I'll cross out the run-on sentences and transparent lies first." Dilbert continues, "Then the failed attempts at cuteness... the spelling errors... grammar." Dilbert returns the press release to a Peggy, who is furious. Dilbert adds, "There you go. Remember, criticism makes you stronger." Dilbert is at home how, clothes torn to shreds, arm in a sling, head bandaged. To Dogbert, he says, "It was a mistake to make her stronger."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budgets, #spreadhseet, #error, #exercise in futility, #hum

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands behind Asok, who sits zombie like at his computer, and says, "It's a funny thing about budgets...." Dilbert says, "No matter how hard you try, there's always a spreadsheet error that makes it all an exercise in futility." Dilbert says, "Do you mind if I hum?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new software, #gently warm, #key board, #easier, #laptop lighter, #market driven, #create diversion

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss pionts to a projection of a steaming keyboard. The boss says, "OUr new software will gently warm your keyboard so the keys are easier to press." Dilber and Wally listen. The boss says, "We'll budnle it with our software that makes your laptop lighter." The boss says, "In a word, we have become "market driven"" Wally whispers, to Dilbert, "Creat a diversion. I'll run for help."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #assisted suicide, #brochure, #job makes alice sick, #doctor, #doctors office, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

ALice sits in the doctor's office. Alice says, "Are you saying my job makes my sick?" Doctor says, "Don't worry there's a cure." The docotr hands Alice a pamphlet and says, "Here's a brochure on assisted suicide." Alice says, "How do you assists?" The doctor says, "I gave you the brochure."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #have a meeting, #project, #makes me unhappy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss satnds in Dilbert's cubicle. The boss says, "I'm off to a meeting about your projext. Is there anything I should know?" Dilbert says, "Yes. You should know how dumb it is to have a meeting about my project without inviting me." The boss walks away and thinks, "Every time I learn something it make me unhappy"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wavy pattern, #carpet, #dizzy, #home, #sleep, #groggy, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally stands in front of the boss' desk and says, "The wavy pattern on the carpet is making me dizzy." Wally says, "I'd better go home and sleep it off." Wally says, "I'll be back tomorrow unless all the sleep makes me groggy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good leader, #listens emplyees, #laughing on inside, #good time

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally stands in front of The Boss. The Boss says, "A good leader listens to his employees..." Wally stands, The Boss says off-frame, "No matter how much he is laughing on the inside." Wally says, "Maybe this isn't a good time." The boss makes a funny face.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #scrap paper, #employees, #put in hat, #makes comforatble, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "Write on a scrap of paper the names of employees who do great work and put them in the hat in my office." Asok says, "And then do you select one name each week to receive valuable rewards?" The Boss says, "No, the scraps of paper make my hat more comfortable."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job secuirty, #be an engineer, #takes all day, #get in on scam

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina says to Alice, at Alice's cubicle, "Alice, I need a career that has job security." Tina says, "Teach me to be an engineer. I don't care if it takes all day." Tina says, "But don't tell anyone; they'll all try to get in on this scam." Alice makes a funny face.