Stop Bothering Me Comic Strips - Page 10
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Dilbert wears a backpack and carries rope. Dilbert says, "I'm going to capture the queen bee of marketing." Dogbert's ears fly up and his fur stands on end. Dogbert says, "No matter what she says, do't be seduced by her marketing buzz." A huge bee lady sits on a throwm looking at a piece of paper. A man says, "A man with a rope is here to see you. I wan't loyal enough to stop him."
Dilbert puts his hands on a wall in Dilmom's living room. Dilbert says, "Your wall is warm, mom." Dilmom says, "Is that bad?" Dilbert says, "There's no way to be sure unless you remove the sheetrock and look." Dilmom says, "Please stop finding defects in my house." Dilbert says, "I smell proprane."
The boss comes up to Alice and says, "Alice, your name was accidentally omitted from the reorganization paperwork." The boss says, "You're in a place known only as org-limbo." Alice says, "Stop making it sound scary!" The boss replies, "Where did Alice go?"
Wally, Catbet, Dilbert, Alice and Asok are in a meeting. Catbert says: "We're changing to a cash balance pension plan." Catbert says: "It will make the company much more competitive." Asok is sitting between an elder co-worker and Alice, Asok says: "Yippee!!! A cash balance plan is good for young employees!" The older employee stands up and says angrily to Asok: "Oh, yeah? Well it's not so good for me!" The older employee says: "I demand that you change it back!" Asok screams: "No!" The older employee throws himself on top of Asok who raises his arms in defense. The older employee says: "I'll snap you like a dried twig, you little zygote!" Asok says: "Ouch! Stop clubbing me with your artificial hip!!" Wally, Catbert and Dilbert watch the fight with no reaction. Wally says to Catbert and Dilbert: "On the plus side, they do seem more competitive."
Dilbert, the Boss, and Wally are at a meeting. The Boss says: "Our division is unusually profitable this year." He turns to Dilbert: "That means our targets for next year will be set impossibly high." He turns to Wally: "Our only hope of reaching our profit target next year..." He continues: "...is to sabotage profits for the rest of this year." He explains further: "It's too late to stop customers from buying our products." He continues: "So we'll focus on increasing wasteful spending." The Boss puts his hand on Wally's shoulder and tells him: "Wally, I'm sending you to a leadership training class." After the meeting, Wally sticks out his coffee mug and asks Dilbert, "Did you ever stick out your coffee mug and just follow where it took you?"
The boss and the new guy are standing at a cubicle. The Boss says to the new guy: "This will be your cubicle." The new guy is sitting at his desk. The Boss continues: "In six weeks our I.T. people will connect you to the network so you can do your job." The Boss says to the new guy, who looks stunned: "I'll stop by every few minutes to see what you are doing."
Mordac types a message to Ming. "Dearest Ming, My love for you is boundless. Mordac" Mordac continues his message. "P.S. If you don't stop putting food garbage in the recycling bin you will be terminated." Ming says to Dilbert after reading Mordacs message, "Never date your boss." Dilbert replies, confused "Okay."
Ming says to Dilbert as they sit together at a table, "Do you mind if I chatter nonstop about people you don't know?" Dilbert answers, "No." Dilbert then asks Ming, "Do you mind if I gawk at every woman who walks by?" Ming answers, "Yes." Ming says to Dilbert, "In fact, I would appreciate it if you displayed no male traits whatsoever." Dilbert responds, "Can do."
The Boss calls to Dilbert as he stands in the doorway of his office. "Thanks to you, my computer screen is all fuzzy now!" Dilbert continues walking, wondering to himself what the Boss was talking about. The Boss is irritated with Dilbert and with both arms raised he says, "You're always fiddling with something that makes something else stop working." Dilbert replies, "Don't clean your screen with your handkerchief during flu season." The Boss answers with both hands on his hips, "Stop changing the subject."
The boss is facing protesters who are carrying signs with a peace sign and a slogan, "Stop Drilling." A protester says, "You're ruining the pristine beauty of Elbonia!" The boss holds up a picture of a barren tree. The boss says, "This is a picture of pristine Elbonia." The protesters are putting the signs in the trunk of a car. A female protester says, "..And then you said, 'It doesn't matter if we see it first.' Then I said..."