Bob Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

185 Results for Bob

View 91 - 100 results for bob comic strips. Discover the best "Bob" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hobby geography, #twirling wedgie, #dinosaur

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a table signing copies of his book. A customer says, "My hobby is geography. Would you sign my book to each of the continents by name?" Dogbert says to the man, "Are you aware that my book recommends a twirling wedgie for people who ask for too much?" A hand reaches toward the man. Bob the Dinosaur twirls the man over his head as he gives him a wedgie. Bob says, "We find the line moves faster if I do this to the first customer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogberts talk radio, #smartest creature, #dolts, #taking calls, #understand complex, #crossfire

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in a radio DJ booth wearing earphones and speaking into a microphone. He says, "I'm the smartest creature in the universe and you are all dolts." Dogbert continues, "Today I'm taking calls from people who think they understand complex issues because they watch 'Crossfire' on CNN." A caller says, ". . . So why not put all poor people in orphanages?" With his paw on the control panel, Dogbert says, "Put your head up to the speaker, Bob."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob the dinosaur, #double fee, #triple fee, #infinity plus one, #childish men, #hired to beat, #tail, #project requiremnets

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I hired Bob the dinosaur to beat you with his tail until you give me the project requirements. MAN: HA! I'll double your fee if you thump Dilbert instead. Dilbert: I 'll triple the fee! Dilbert: He can't really pay you "infinity" plus one. BOB: I wonder how much this is on an hourly basis.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat, #not optimist, #phrased better, #rakberts head, #stomp on it, #yank off, #bob the dinosaur, #rat, #dog, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

"Bob, I'll yank the cat off of Ratbert's head and you stomp on it!" "Yank" "Stomp" "I could have phrased that better." "I'm not an optimist anymore."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #choke on donut, #psychic powers, #bob in office

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Is Bob in his office? Carol: Since Bob's office is all of twenty feet away, I'll have to use my psychic powers to determine the answer. Dilbert: I could go look. Carol: Bob hates you, He secretly wishes you'd choke on a donut.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rattus not rat, #genus, #larger community, #squeak, #forgot to laugh, #so funny

View Transcript

Transcript

"From now on, Bob please refer to me as a 'rattus', not by the diminutive term 'rat'." "Frankly, I've never thought of folks like you in terms of your genus. I see you as part of a larger community." "Really?" "Yeah - the community of things that go 'sqeak' when I step on them." "That's so funny I forgot to laugh."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #budget analyst, #delegate, #dinosaur, #engineers, #find dumber customers, #letter, #marketing genius, #new vp, #senior mangement, #wedgies

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob the dinosaur; gives wedgies to corporate people who deserve it. Budget analyst I don't understand any of our projects, I cut the ones with "E" In their names. BOB: What was that letter? analysts: EEEE! Engineers Wally: we doubled our costs, to add back up systems. Dilbert: You ant be too careful. Bob: two at once. In case one enjoys it. Wally: MMMM Marketing genius Market segmentation is the key. Dont improve the product just find dumber customers! Senior management BOB: These guys know how to delegate! You're the new VP of wedgies.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chicken to dinosaur, #vegatables, #vegetarian

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "Would you like some chicken, Bob?" "I told you I'm a vegetarian. I eat vegetables." "How about fish? Do you eat fish?" "Fish are not vegetables." "How about clams? Do you eat clams?" "No, but you're starting to look good."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #Dogbert, #money, #shopping, #christmas, #man, #wedgie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Remember, Bob, it is better to give to Dogbert than to receive . . . Especially at Christmas." Bob replies, "But I don't have any income . . . Except for the coins people drop when I give them wedgies." Bob gives a man a wedgie and money falls out of his pockets. Bob thinks, "It seems like exactly the wrong season to pick up the pace on this sort of thing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #Dilbert, #ratbert, #email, #computer, #Dogbert, #wedgie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on the desk chair. He says, "The e-mail votes have been tabulated. The will of the people is that Ratbert shall be spared from getting whacked with a magazine." Dilbert says to Ratbert, "I guess there's nothing funny about random cruelty." Bob the Dinosaur gives Dilbert a wedgie and says, "Right! Cruelty is only funny if administered in a proper social context."