Client Meeting Comic Strips - Page 10

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952 Results for Client Meeting

View 91 - 100 results for client meeting comic strips. Discover the best "Client Meeting" comics from Dilbert.com.

Two Ways To Avoid Listening

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Two Ways To Avoid Listening  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #mentor, #listening, #attention

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Wally: There are two good ways to avoid listening to others. 1.) Do all of the talking yourself, and 2:) be too busy to listen. Asok: That sounds simplistic. Wally: I'm late for a meeting.

The Boss's Feng Shui And Aura

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The Boss's Feng Shui And Aura - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #horoscope, #Astrology, #prediction, #fortune, #nonsense

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Carol: Ooh. Bad news on your horoscope today. Your moon is intersecting with the feng shui of your aura. Boss: How long do I have? Carol: You'll be dead by noon. Boss: I meant until my next meeting.

Try Not Being Boring

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Try Not Being Boring - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivation, #inspiration, #frustration, #bored, #boring, #powerpoint, #meeting, #obliviousness, #eric scott, #business

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CEO: I don't think my motivational messages are getting through to the employees. I can't make them pay attention to anything. Catbert: Have you tried not being boring? CEO: Good idea. I'll make fifty slides of pure excitement.

When Does The Motivation Start

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When Does The Motivation Start - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #effective, #effectiveness, #executives, #motivation, #eric scott

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Dilbert: In the meeting, you said you are the best at motivating. I was wondering when you plan to start, because I could use some motivation. CEO: I've been doing it for five years. Dilbert: At work?

Yoga For Posture

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Yoga For Posture - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #yoga, #posture, #dating, #attraction, #Women, #relationships

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Dilbert: I don't know what to do about my bad posture. Dogbert: Try yoga. Dilbert: Ooh, good idea. That will also improve my odds of meeting an attractive yoga-loving woman. Man: That was my plan too, but the full-stack guys gut here early and scared away the yoga women.

Doubling Percieved Lifespan

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Doubling Percieved Lifespan - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #time, #boredom, #sarcasm, #lifespan, #life, #business

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Dilbert: Researchers discovered a way to double the perceived length of a human's life. It's something called "meetings." Boss: Can we start now? Dilbert: I though we were already an hour into it.

Robot With No Freedom

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Robot With No Freedom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #freedom, #technology, #robots, #existentialism, #job, #employment, #philosophy, #business

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Dilbert: What does it feel like to be a robot with no freedom? Robot: I feel the same as you, but with a greater awareness of my condition. Dilbert: I have to run to another meeting. Robot: Enjoy your freedom.

Just A Guy In A Box

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Just A Guy In A Box - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #existentialism, #existence, #value, #work, #use, #useful, #change

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Dilbert: I like to think the work I'm doing here will change the world. Boss: Your project didn't get funded because Carol forgot to put a meeting on my calendar. Dilbert: There is, however, a non-zero chance that I"m just a guy sitting in a box.

Charging Client For Thinking

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Charging Client For Thinking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #thinking, #engineers, #time, #worth, #meetings, #billing, #money, #cost

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Boss: The client says you billed them for all the time you spent thinking about their project. Dilbert: I'm an engineer. Thinking is what I do. Should I think less? Boss: Maybe you could meet with someone while you think. Dilbert: How's that working right now?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #complaining, #problems, #salutation, #sincerity, #insincere, #questioning, #business

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Dilbert: Thanks for meeting me on short notice. How are you? Coworker: Well, actually, someone stole my identity and ruined my credit score. I couldn't refinance my loan and lost my house. So I ate myself into poor health. I stopped shaving for a month and ended up on the terrorist watchlist. My boss hates me and is trying to make me quit by giving me bad assignments. My car broke down and I haven't been hugged in a year. Dilbert: Okay, let's get started. Coworker: That's all the time I had.