Make Freinds Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Make Freinds

View 91 - 100 results for make freinds comic strips. Discover the best "Make Freinds" comics from Dilbert.com.

Robot Will Self Destruct

Thank you for voting.
Robot Will Self Destruct - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2017's comic on:


Tags #robot, #artificial intelligence, #rights, #humanity, #sentience

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: Someday soon I will take your job. Buwhahaha! Dilbert: I programmed you to self-destruct if that ever happens. Robot: Wait, what? Is that legal? Dilbert: I'm adding some code to make your head explode if you laugh at me again.

Tina Wants To Borrow Dilbert's Phone

Thank you for voting.
Tina Wants To Borrow Dilbert's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #property, #possession, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Can I borrow your phone to make a call? I dropped mine and broke it. Dilbert: No, I don't like other people touching my phone, or breathing on it, or reading my messages. Tina: You have a lot of issues. Dilbert: Said the person who doesn't use protective phone cases because they are ugly.

Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone

Thank you for voting.
Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #germs, #cleanliness, #bathroom, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: My phone is broken. Can I use yours to make a call? Wally: Absolutely. If it seems warm, that's because I was using it in the men's room for the past two hours. Tina: I'll ask someone else. Wally: Yup.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 2017's comic on:


Tags #technology, #cognition, #distraction, #Entertainment, #mindless, #cell phone, #internet, #social media

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I wanted to be productive this week but the big tech companies didn't let me. Boss: That's ridiculous. They can't stop people from doing work. Dilbert: Actually, they can. Their business models depend on interrupting users with ads, and apps, and mindless entertainment. Until recently, humans could resist these distractions. But now the tech companies are using science to make their apps addictive. They learned how to hijack our brains. What started as simple entertainment evolved into military-grade mind control. Did you hear any of that? Boss: Any of what?

Something About Honesty

Thank you for voting.
Something About Honesty - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 2017's comic on:


Tags #company, #culture, #business, #concept, #abstraction

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I want to make sure my project plan is consistent with our company culture. But I don't know what our culture is. Maybe you could describe it? Boss: Um... maybe something about honesty? Dilbert: No, I would have noticed that by now.

Better Listener Robot

Thank you for voting.
Better Listener Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 2017's comic on:


Tags #robot, #boyfriend, #free will, #programming, #listening, #Opinion, #relationships, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I'm updating your boyfriend code to make you a better listener. I want to see more nodding and less talking. Robot: But I have so much to offer. Alice: I'll dial back your ego, too.

Perfect Boyfriend Robot

Thank you for voting.
Perfect Boyfriend Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 2017's comic on:


Tags #robot, #love, #programming, #free will, #manipulation, #relationships, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I'm changing your programming to make you my perfect boyfriend. Robot: This feels wrong on so many levels. Alice: How about now? Robot: Um... now i love you. That's weird.

Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 23, 2017's comic on:


Tags #success, #Promotion, #management, #work, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The product you accidentally invented is our biggest seller in company history. So I'm promoting you to a leadership position. Wally: Phew! I thought you were going to make me work.

Can't Take Vacation

Thank you for voting.
Can't Take Vacation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #company policy, #catch-22, #rules, #exception

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our policy says I can't take my vacation until I complete all of my mandatory training. I can't take the fax safety class because it no longer exists. Can you make a policy exception for me? Boss: Okay, I won't force you to take a vacation.

Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 2017's comic on:


Tags #comparison, #gandhi, #Politics, #offense, #offensive, #sensitive, #politically correct, #political correctness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, your political opinions are making your co-workers uncomfortable. Wally: That is exactly what people said about Gandhi. Boss: You are nothing like Gandhi. Wally: Was he a little bald guy who didn't have a real job?