One More Thing Comic Strips - Page 10

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1000 Results for One More Thing

View 91 - 100 results for one more thing comic strips. Discover the best "One More Thing" comics from Dilbert.com.

5 G Gives You A Bird Head

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  5 G Gives You A Bird Head - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, social media, bird head, study, apathy, 5g

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dilbert: according to people on social media, our 5g technology will "give you a bird head." maybe we should study it a bit more. wally: nah, i'd wait until we see a beak.

Dilbert Is Sexist

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 Dilbert Is Sexist  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, managers & supervisors, office workers, fire, crazy, gender, true, false, anger, face mask

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tina: i want you to fire dilbert because he said i might be nuts. he wouldn't say that to a man. boss: he said the same thing to me last week. tina yelling: it doesn't count if it's true!

Vendor With No Facemask

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Vendor With No Facemask  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags covering, face, face mask, managers & supervisors, plastic, required, suffocated, vendor

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boss: can you believe a vendor tried to come in here with no face mask? i told him it didn't matter what kind of face covering he used, it only mattered that he had one. this is where my tale takes a dark turn. now peeved, the vendor stormed back to his car, where he had a bagged lunch. he angrily removed the plastic wrap from his sandwich and wrapped it around his head to serve as his face mask. he suffocated in minutes obviously. dilbert: is that the sandwich? boss: would have gone to waste.

Offer 90 Percent Less

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 Offer 90 Percent Less  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, price, list, stupid, impact, face mask, business

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boss: try offering 90% less than the list price and see if they take it. dilbert: no one reduces their prices by 90% just because you want them to do it. i will look stupid for asking! boss: watch how that doesn't impact me at all.

Asok Analysis

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 Asok Analysis  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, decision, managers & supervisors, numbers, analysis, experience, liars, department

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boss: put some numbers on this decision so it looks a if we thought about it longer. asok: are you seriously telling me to do the analysis after the decision? boss: if you need help, talk to one of the experienced liars in the department.

Dilbert Tells The Odds

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Dilbert Tells The Odds - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, decision, estimate, managers & supervisors, miscommunication, odds, technology, wrong

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dilbert: i estimate odds at a 70% chance things go well, and a 30% chance we lose money on the deal. boss: if we lose money, will you admit you were wrong? dilbert: how could i be wrong? i'm just telling you the odds. boss: if we lose money, that's on you for recommending it. dilbert: um...no. i'm telling you the odds and letting you decide. boss: but you're the one saying this is such a great deal. dilbert upsetting and yelling forcing face mask off his face: i'm only telling you the odds, you pea-brained ignoramus!!! boss: so, you won't admit you were wrong? dilbert's face mask is over his eyes.

Sarcasm Works Better

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Sarcasm Works Better  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags argument, technology, business, production, productivity, sarcasm

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dogbert wearing face mask: i stopped using good arguments because sarcasm works better. dilbert wearing face mask: that doesn't sound like a productive thing to do. dogbert: oooh, look who's an expert on productivity now.

People Believe Anything

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People Believe Anything - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags argument, business, people, believe, anything, whisper, campaign, rival, management, dumb, covid, pandemic

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all parties wearing face masks. boss: i'm starting a whisper campaign against my rival in management. i want you to tell people he buys babies from the poor and eats them. dilbert: no one is dumb enough to believe that. boss: people will believe anything. dilbert: not anything. boss: yes, anything. dilbert: fine. i'll try it, but only to prove how wrong you are. office worker: how many does he eat per day? dilbert thinking: i need a new planet.

Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist

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Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, racism, fired, employees, white supremacist, apathy, career, punch, witness, denial

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ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.

Wally Took Notes

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Wally Took Notes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, co-workers, forward, hungry, insults, intelligence, managers & supervisors, meeting, notes, pandemic, release, schedule, snack, technology, version, covid

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staff in conference room and all wearing face masks. dilbert: we agreed at our last meeting to postpone the version release. tina: no, we agreed to do it sooner. dilbert: i don't think so. who took notes at the last meeting? wally: i did. click wally: forwarding those notes to each of you. dilbert: um...your notes are mostly insults about the intelligence of your co-workers and...some sort of snack list. this is no help at all. wally: don't blame me. i'm not the one who schedules these meetings when i'm hungry.