$35 Worth Food Comic Strips - Page 10

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216 Results for $35 Worth Food

View 91 - 100 results for $35 worth food comic strips. Discover the best "$35 Worth Food" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #cop, #under, #arrest, #killing, #senior, #executive, #ear, #corn, #self-defense

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Dilbert opens the door. A police officer points a gun at him and says, "You're under arrest for killing a senior executive of your company with an ear of corn." As the officer frisks him, beads of sweat fly off Dilbert's head and he cries, "It . . . It was self-defense! HE started the food fight! I had just seasoned my corn . . . It was in my hand . . . It was just a reflex!!" The officer says, "The charge is 'a salt and buttering with intent to kill.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #corn, #ear, #lunch, #believe, #jail, #cell mate, #meal

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Dilbert sits in a prison cell with a large man. The man asks, "What are you in for?" Dilbert replies, "I killed a man with an ear of corn. But I was provoked." A guard hands a tray of food into the cell and Dilbert says, "Hey, look! Corn for lunch. Can you believe that?" His cellmate looks frightened.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #dinosaur, #Dogbert, #economic, #advisor, #president, #money, #stimulating, #economy, #fritter, #health

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Bob the Dinosaur and Dogbert sit at the table. Bob asks, "You're going to be an economic advisor to the President? What do you know about economics?" Dogbert replies, "It's simple, Bob." Dogbert explains, "The country needs to give all the money to dogs, thus stimulating the economy." Bob asks, "Why can't we spend the money ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "You'd probably fritter it away on food and health care."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #fiasco, #rare, #disease, #puppetitis, #hand, #puppet, #catch

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My date was a fiasco." Dilbert continues, "She has a rare disease called puppetitis - it makes your hand act like a puppet." Dilbert continues, "Apparently you can catch it by holding hands." Dilbert moves his hand like a puppet and says, "But it was worth it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #organized, #tasks, #priorities, #trouble, #stapler, #oil, #goodness, #Wally

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Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "There . . . I've organized all of my tasks into 'A,' 'B' and 'C' priorities." Dilbert thinks, "The 'A' priorities aren't even worth doing. And the 'B' priority stuff would probably get me in trouble." Dilbert asks Wally, "Are you done with the stapler oil?" Wally holds up a polished stapler and says, "Thank goodness for 'C' priorities."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #patent, #ignorance

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert hands Dilbert a book and says, "I thought of another way to profit from the ignorance of humans." Dogbert explains, "I wrote 'The Dogbert Formula for Health.' I recommend a daily dose of food, sleep and exercise." Dogbert says, "And for only $19.95 you can buy the patented 'Dogbert Joggerobic Carpet Patch' to help you run in place."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #volunteers, #cell phone, #ratbert, #car salespeople

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Dilbert sits outside the dome and types on a laptop, "With oxygen and food nearly depleted, the Bioworld volunteers become philosophical." Dogbert and Ratbert communicate using cellular phones. Ratbert says, "Some of the volunteers think that because they're car salespeople you don't value their lives . . ." Dogbert says, "If that were true, how can you explain that we put you in there too?" Ratbert says, "That's what I said, but it didn't seem to cheer them up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #watching tv, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #cable tv, #man, #woman

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Dogbert aims a video camera at Ratbert. Dilbert asks, "What are you filming?" Dogbert replies, "Ratbert got his own cable tv channel." Dogbert explains, "Now that cable tv has a thousand channels they're desperate for original programs." A man and a woman sit on a couch watching television. The man points the remote control at the tv and says, "Back in the six hundreds I saw a rat slapping his head to a Barry Manilow tune." The woman says, "That's worth a second look."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #Dogbert, #the boss, #company president, #stock, #business trip

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Dogbert sits at his desk reading the newspaper. Dogbert says, "What?? The presidents of other companies make way more money than I do!!" Dogbert continues, "I'd better make some short-sighted cuts. That should raise our stock price and make my stock options worth millions." The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, ". . . All business trips are one-way from now on . . . And you're all required to take a trip this afternoon."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #man, #outdoors, #Dogbert, #taser

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Dogbert sits on a rock. A man says, "Hey, little dog, smile. It only takes two muscles!" Dogbert zaps the man with a phaser pistol. The man screams. Dogbert says, "That took a few extra muscles, but I think it was worth it."