Don't Handle Stress Comic Strips - Page 10
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1000 Results for Don't Handle Stress
View 91 - 100 results for don't handle stress comic strips. Discover the best "Don't Handle Stress" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday July 04,
2002
Tags #coffee with the boss, #meeting, #feel free, #don't hold back, #squeaky chair, #ungrateful wretch, #name calling, #business
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "You're the first employee for my 'Coffee with the Boss' program." The Boss continues, "Feel free to say whatever is on your mind. Don't hold back. Give it to me straight." Dilbert says, "My chair has a squeak." The Boss yells, "You ungrateful whiny wretch!!!"
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday December 19,
2002
Tags #early death, #over working, #grim reaper, #love job, #unlike you, #don't look grim
Transcript
Dilbert says to The Boss and Wally, "I'm well on my way to an early death from overworking." Dilbert continues, "I expect a visit from the grim reaper any day now." Dilbert is approached by the grim reaper. Dilbert says, "You don't look grim." The grim reaper responds, "Unlike you, I love my job."
Monday April 14,
2003
Tags #leave work early, #don't walk past, #office of boss, #just from roof, #land in dumpster, #leadership, #cut throat
Transcript
The Boss addresses a meeting, "Our VP is mad because people are leaving work too early." The Boss turns to Alice and says, "If you need to leave early, don't walk past his office. Go to the roof and leap into the 'dumpster' in the alley." The VP sits smugly in his office and thinks, "Leadership triumphs again." Alice can be seen through the window behind him jumping off the roof into the dumpster.
Friday May 09,
2003
Tags #revenue estimates, #research, #too late, #higher revenue, #stress, #flashlight, #eyes, #science
Transcript
The Boss pokes his head in to Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Double the revenue estimates and make sure the research supports it." Dilbert responds, "But.. but... it's too late! The research is done, and it won't support higher revenue!" Dilbert is sitting on a doctor's table, shivering. The doctor flashes a light on Dilbert's face and says, "Your stress is from a combination of drive-by- management and a flashlight in your eyes."
Thursday July 31,
2003
Tags #criticize things, #dont understnd, #kyoto treaty, #flat tax, #unfair, #stem cells
Transcript
Dogbert: I've decided to spend more time criticizing things I don't understand. I say we should flat-tax the kyoto treaty all the way back to the security council, Dilbert: wouldn't that be unfair to stem cells? Dogbert: Bah!
Friday October 17,
2003
Tags #tunnel shark, #dig forever, #red button, #don't push button
Transcript
Dilbert: I call it the "Tunnel SHrk" It converts dirt and rock into energy and can dig forever. So whatever you do, don't ignore what Im saying and push the red button. The Boss: Button! Now whats gotten into you?
Friday December 05,
2003
Tags #fist of death, #foot of death, #doctor, #exam room, #dont use, #Advice, #health, #carpal syndrome, #medical
Transcript
Doctor: You've got a bad case of carpal punchel syndrome. Doctor: Don't use your "fist of death" for a few weeks. Alice: GAAA!!! Wally: the "Foot of death" is not the same. Asok: It is only slightly menacing.
Thursday February 05,
2004
Tags #customers, #buy prodcut, #credibilty, #buying services, #dont talk
Transcript
"Dogberts Consults." Dogbert: "Never listen to your customers." "They were dumb enough to buy your product, so they have no credibility." "That reminds me: thanks for buying my services. Don't talk. Shhh." The boss: "Ooh."
Tuesday June 22,
2004
Tags #online study class, #sexual harrasmnet, #don't have one, #happy actors
Transcript
Wally: "I'm about halfway finished with the online studay class on sexual harassment." The Boss: "Wally, we don't have an online study course on sexual harassment." Wally: "THat would explain why all the actors seemed so happy."
Tuesday August 31,
2004
Tags #don't eat money, #false hope business, #lose weight, #get rich, #semi plausible
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm going into the false hope business. All I need is a semi plausible message about how to lose weight while getting rich." "Don't eat your money."