Future Visionary Leader Not Being Born Comic Strips - Page 10
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Share December 14, 2000's comic on:
Noriko watches as The Boss gestures toward Wally and says, "If anything happens to me, Wally will be your leader." Wally thinks, "?" Reaching for her purse, Noriko exclaims to The Boss, "I have a multi-vitamin! Quick, take it!" Noriko listens to The Boss' pulse with a stethoscope while Dilbert massages The Boss' shoulders. The Boss holds a glass of water. Noriko says, "We're safe for now." Wally says, "This turned out to be a mixed blessing."
Share December 29, 2000's comic on:
Catbert and Dilbert watch The Boss who is in a coma at his desk. Catbert says, "A manager's brain is like a pump. If it becomes empty you must prime it." Catbert says to Dilbert, "Whatever he learns first will form the foundation for all of his future perceptions." Catbert points at Dilbert and says to The Boss, "This guy has been talking smack about you." The Boss begins to come to, saying, "Unh..."
Share June 08, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert approaches the Boss. He asks, "Did you look at my travel request?" The Boss replies, "Not yet." The Boss continues, "Assume it's approved unless I tell you otherwise." Dilbert replies, "It's too bad that being useless isn't an Olympic sport."
Share February 01, 2002's comic on:
Headline: Man-Hating Supervisor. Asok is sitting at his desk. The supervisor approaches and says, "You're being fired for being a man." Asok replies, "No one has ever called me a man before! This is the happiest day of my life!" Asok dances around and shouts, "I'm a MAN!" The supervisor exclaims, "Stop enjoying life!!"
Share April 19, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert asks a business associate, "Can you get this done in thirty days?" The business associate replies, "Yes, absolutely." The business associate continues, "We'll just travel faster than light to a black hole and discover a doorway in time." Dilbert replies, "That sounds iffy." The business associate says, "Excuse me for being flexible."
Share July 25, 2002's comic on:
Carol enters The Boss' office and says, "The feng shui in your office is terrible." The Boss replies, "It is?" Carol says, "That hum... it's the sound of your energy being drained into the internet." Dilbert asks Carol, "Who told him that his computer fan is killing him?"
Share January 23, 2003's comic on:
Dilbert points to a slide of the beaver and says, "The project is behind schedule because our contractor is a lazy beaver." Dilbert says to The Boss, "For a while he was making up excuses. Now, he doesn't return calls." The Boss replies, "What's your plan?" Dilbert says, "I hope to get him back to making up excuses by promising him more jobs in the future."
Share May 26, 2003's comic on:
The Boss hands Dilbert a stack of papers and says, "Can you summarize this on one page for our CEO?" Dilbert responds, "Yes, but it will obliterate the persuasiveness of the document and cost us billions in lost opportunity." The Boss responds, "I see your point, but being wordy is bad, too."
Share May 31, 2003's comic on:
The Boss and Dilbert are looking at the new product brochure. Dilbert says, "We might want to scale back some of the claims in our new brochure." The Boss asks, "Which ones?" Dilbert responds, "For example, where it says, 'provides diplomatic immunity against all current and future felonies.'" The Boss says, "That's just poetic license." Dilbert reads, "Turn used motor oil into root beer."
Share June 07, 2003's comic on:
The addresses a meeting, "The future of the company depends on new product revenue." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Is that why you slashed the research and development budget?" The Boss replies, "If you're so smart, let's see you describe our future without using the word 'doomed.'"