Ignorance (Knowledge) Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

177 Results for Ignorance (Knowledge)

View 91 - 100 results for ignorance (knowledge) comic strips. Discover the best "Ignorance (Knowledge)" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags higher drag coefficient, interns head, quantify benefits, knowledge management

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says to the Boss: "I've been asked to quantify the benefits of our knowledge management systems." She points to a photograph of an intern: "I measured our intern's head to see if it got bigger." She explains: "The higher drag coefficient means we lost a little in the sandwich-fetching department."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags untrained eye, no work, raging sea, knowledge managemnet, strategic thinking, gurgling sound

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to the Boss, "To the untrained eye it might look as if I do no work." Wally continues as he points to his head, "But inside here is a raging sea of knowledge management and strategic thinking." Wally then asks the Boss, "Did you hear that gurgling sound?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employees, ignorant, intranet collaboration, sign it, their ignorance, tools, dogbert consults, business

View Transcript

Transcript

As a consultant, Dogbert says to the Boss "All of your employees are ignorant." Dobgert continues, "I can fix that by selling you intranet collaboration tools." The Boss says to Dgbert in an uneasy voice, "But if they're sharing their ignorance..." Dogbert thinks to himself, "Sign it, sign it, sign it..."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags share knowledge, new intranet, collaboration software, knowledge to share, hurst, true, hoarding

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says to Dilbert and Wally, "Who wants to share knowlege with me via our new intranet collaboration software?" Dilbert says to Asok, "You don't have any knowledge to share." Asok replies, "Ouch. It hurts because it's true." Wally says to Dilbert, "I'm hoarding my knowledge in case I ever need it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags internet, personal rasons, whole world, knowledge, entertainmemt, finger tips, ice cream, so hungry, eating in cubicle, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, sitting at his computer, thinks, "I..must..resist..using..the internet for personal reasons." Dilbert thinks, "Gaa! There's a whole world of knowledge and entertainment at my fingertips...teasing me!" Catbert dangles an ice-cream cone from a pole in front of Dilbert. Dilbert says, "Ice Cream! I'm so hungry!" Catbert says, "No eating in your cubicle."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no raise, not enough questions, meetings, care about job, thirst for knowledge, likes wood

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok the Intern sits across from the Boss. The Boss says, "I can't give you a raise. You don't ask enough questions in meetings." The Boss continues, "Questions show that you care about your job and have a thirst for knowledge." Asok is seen at a staff meeting, hand raised, asking, "Who else likes wood?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags top down budget, bottom up budget, ignorance, cruelty, lying, optimism, cancel, wasted hour

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: "I averaged the top-down budget with the bottom-up budget." "As you can see, the ignorance and cruelty canceled out the lying and optimism." Alice: "Do you have anything to cancel out feelings of a wasted hour?" Man: "Have you tried despair?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags negotiate sale, voice activated hassock business, no lying, plenty of ommissions, tactical ignorance

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "I want you to negotiate the sale of our voice activated hassock business." "You're not allowed to lie, but I expect plenty of omissions, misdirections, exaggerations..." "...Unjustified optimism, lost documents, unclear explanations, gray areas and tactical ignorance. Oh, and say that we have other offers."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags database analyst, tech writer, database anaylst, ignorance with certainty

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Tina, our database analyst quit, so I need you to take over that job. Tina: I'm curious... how long do you think it takes to train a tech writer to be a database analyst? Boss: Forty-five minutes. Tina: I like how you punctuate ignorance with certainty.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags compliment, punch and hate ignorance, certainty, punctuate ignorance with ceratinty

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Tina gave me a great compliment. She said I punch and hate ignorance with certainty. Dilbert: Are you sure she didn't say you punctuate your ignorance with certainty? Boss: I'm positive! Hah-cha!