Internet Problems Comic Strips - Page 10

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396 Results for Internet Problems

View 91 - 100 results for internet problems comic strips. Discover the best "Internet Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #saved money, #hired guy, #unlucky, #many problems, #ex boyfreind, #sobers up

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The Boss introduces a new employee to Dilbert, "We saved money by hiring a guy who's had many personal problems." The Boss continues, "But we're sure he was just unlucky. No one would invite that many problems into his life." The new employee's cell phone rings. The new employee says into his cell phone, "Yes, of course your ex-boyfriend can stay with us until the choppers leave and he sobers up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet traffic, #good thing, #under sewage, #breathe through straw, #grateful, #sewer system

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Wally: "Asok, would you like to join a doomed project for sending internet traffic over the sewer system?" Asok: "Absolutely! I might be young and inexperienced, but I know a good thing when I see it!" Wally: "I need you to work under the sewage and breathe through a straw." Asok: "I get a straw?!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nutty boss, #halluciantions, #sadistic nut, #having problems, #unhealthy boss

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The Boss: "I'm having problems at home, so I'll be taking it out on you today." "I'll begin by hallucinating that you said something bad. Then I'll yell at you for saying it." "I AM NOT A SADISTIC NUT!!!" Dilbert: "If I go to my cubicle, can you hallucinate that I'm here?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ted, #forward to ted, #email, #solved problems, #project, #being rude, #remove from project

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Dilbert: Ted is being rude and helpful. Can you ask his boss to remove him from the project? The Boss: I'll forward this to Ted. That should help. Dilbert: I wonder how people solved problems before email.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #check, #forgiveness, #philosophy, #rip out heart, #seek forgiveness, #ask permission, #internet, #technology

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Alice: Gaaa!!! How could you do this without checking with me??!! My philosophy is that its better to seek forgiveness than to ask for permission. Dilbert: did he say you could rip out hi heart and sell it on the internet? Alice: Kinda.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hot mess employee, #magnet for problems, #wally stalks her

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"My life is a rolling disaster." "I'm a magnet for all problems legal, financial, medical and romantic." "Uh-oh... I sense another disaster brewing." wally: "Shes cute. I think I'll stalk her every day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brown bag seminars, #ethical, #ethics problems, #seminar

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The Boss: The company will be holding a series of brown bag seminars on corporate ethics. Dilbert:is it ethical to steal our lunch hour and pretend that the ethics problems sent come from our executives? The Boss: I wouldn't know because I haven't taken the seminar.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #other people, #problems, #discomfort, #effect on oether, #oblivious

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Dilbert: I've noticed that all my problems are caused by other people. Dilbert: Ive noticed that all of my problems are caused by other people. Yet ut seen sos unlikely that other people would cause me so much discomfort while i never bother anyone. Is it possible that Im oblivious to my effect on others? dogcart: ZZZZZ

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #little experiment, #stupid opinion, #aggressively mock, #passing fad, #internet is fad, #internet is everywhere, #back up plan, #attribute opinon

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Dilbert is sitting on the couch, eating, watching TV. Dogbert says to him, "I'm trying a little experiment tonight." Dobert continues, "I'll attribute a stupid opinion to you..." "Then I"ll aggressively mock you while you sit there saying nothing." Dogbert says, "So, according to you, the internet is a passing fad." Dogbert screams, "You moron! Look around you! The internet is everywhere!" Then, "And there's nothing you can do about it! Nothing!" Dilbert, who has turned back to the TV, asks, "How did that feel?" Dogbert replies, "Quite satisfying." Dilbert offers Dogbert some of what he's eating. Dogbert then adds, "I needed a backup plan in case you every get laryngitis."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email two copies, #fax, #green paper, #email, #files, #hard copy, #internet, #motivation gone, #losing consciousness, #lazy employees, #technology

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Dilbert stands at the boss' desk. The boss says, "e-mail two copies to me when you're done." Dilbert says, "Two copies? It's e0mail." The boss says, "So?" Dilbert says, "Never mind. I'll e-mail two copies." The boss says, "and fax a copy in green paper for my files." Dilbert says, "Green? It's a fax!" The boss walks Dilbert out of his office and says, "And bring me a hard copy of the internet so I can do some serious surfing." Dilbert begins to faint in the doorway. Dilbert thinks, "Motivation.... gonve.. losing consciousness.." Dilber joins the pile of passed out employess by the boss' door. The boss thinks, "How did I end up with all the lazy employees?"