Boss: My doctor says he's never seen anyone heal as quickly as me. Dilbert: What do you suppose that means? Boss: Obviously it means I am genetically gifted. Dilbert: Is that the only explanation? Boss: Well, maybe ten percent of it is because of good medical care. Dilbert: Can you think of any other reason at all? Alice: Doctors tell idiots their bodies are magic because it makes them feel special. Dilbert: He would have gotten there. Alice: I don't have that kind of time.
boss: i hired you to predict the future, of our industry, but everything you say makes me sad.
dogbert: don't blame me. i only predict the future. i don't make the future. unless you buy my special platinum level service.
boss: nice upsell.