Boss: We won a bid to design stealth clothing for the military. Wally: Ooh! Ooh! I volunteer to work on that project. Boss: Um... okay. Narrator: One month later. Boss: Your attendance has been poor lately. Wally: Here's where I teach you about "reasonable doubt."
Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.
all parties wearing face masks.
boss: i'm starting a whisper campaign against my rival in management. i want you to tell people he buys babies from the poor and eats them.
dilbert: no one is dumb enough to believe that.
boss: people will believe anything.
dilbert: not anything.
boss: yes, anything.
dilbert: fine. i'll try it, but only to prove how wrong you are.
office worker: how many does he eat per day?
dilbert thinking: i need a new planet.