Poorly Written Document Comic Strips - Page 10
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244 Results for Poorly Written Document
View 91 - 100 results for poorly written document comic strips. Discover the best "Poorly Written Document" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday January 03,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #elves, #demands, #slapped, #pointy, #hats, #flat, #Funny
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table on which four elves are standing. Dilbert reads from a document, "We the elves make the following demands . . ." Dilbert holds up a fly swatter and asks, "Wouldn't it be funny if I just slapped your pointy hats flat?" The elves walk away wearing flattened hats. An elf says, "I cannot believe what passes for funny around here."
Friday January 10,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #tina, #meetings, #work, #friday, #brain, #dead, #productive, #late
Transcript
Dilbert, the Boss and two people sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "I don't know why we even bother holding meetings on Friday afternoons . . ." Dilbert continues, "I mean, everybody is brain-dead by now. Is this really productive?" A woman reads a document and says, "Hmm . . . Productive? . . . Hmm . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I'm too late."
Tuesday January 14,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #jail, #rich, #famous, #record, #stole, #investors, #learned, #lesson, #term, #over
Transcript
Dogbert stands in the door under a sign that says, "Dogbert's Jail for the Rich and Famous." A man carrying a briefcase says, "Checking in." Dogbert sits at a desk reading a document and the man sits across from him. Dogbert says, "Your record says you stole three billion dollars from investors." The man laughs. Dogbert continues, "I guess you've learned your lesson." The man looks at his watch and says, "Whoa! Looks like my jail term is almost over!"
Monday March 02,
1992
Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #poll, #results, #name, #outside, #living, #room, #guy, #kitchen, #discouraged
Transcript
Ratbert says to Dogbert, "The poll results are in." Ratbert reads a document and continues, "You still have low name recognition outside of the living room . . . But some guy in the kitchen thinks he's heard of you." Ratbert continues, "Don't be discouraged, uh . . . Uh . . ." Dogbert yells, "Dogbert!"
Thursday June 25,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #common sense, #school, #water, #boot, #heel, #betty, #liquid, #hair, #partial, #credit
Transcript
Dogbert asks, "Who can show me how to get the water out of this boot?" Dogbert hands the boot to a woman and says, "If you have trouble, the directions are written on the heel." As the woman puts her head into the boot, Dogbert says, "I'm sorry, Betty. I can only give you partial credit for trying to absorb the liquid with your hair."
Monday August 10,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #sarcasm, #Dilbert, #warrior, #battle, #memos, #meetings, #image, #eternity, #life, #pathetic, #help
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the dresser mirror tying his necktie and Dogbert sits on the bed. Dogbert says, "The mighty warrior prepares for battle . . ." Dogbert continues, "Today, bold memos will be written, dangerous meetings will be attended, and many a photocopied image will be captured for eternity." Dilbert says, "If it weren't for sarcasm, my life would sound pathetic." Dogbert replies, "Glad to help."
Monday March 01,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #tim, #writer, #famous, #memo, #february, #boss, #performance, #review, #copy, #typo
Transcript
A man says to Dilbert and Wally, "Hi, I'm Tim Zumph, writer of the famous memo of February third, 1978 . . ." Tim continues, "I remember it so clearly. My boss walked right up and said 'Nice memo, Tim.' And it wasn't even time for my annual performance review." Tim shows them a document and says, "I still keep a copy with me." Wally points at the memo and says, "Typo . . ."
Friday May 21,
1993
Tags #company, #headquarters, #plan, #employees, #offer, #deceptively, #retire, #Wally, #alice, #calculate, #cosine
Transcript
At company headquarters, someone asks, "Does anybody have a plan for getting rid of the employees?" Another person answers, "Well, they're bad at math; we could offer deceptively small sums of money to people who retire." Dilbert, Wally and Alice read copies of a document. Dilbert says, "Hey, this could be good." Wally says, "It's been a long time since I had to calculate the cosine of anything."
Monday July 26,
1993
Tags #big business, #trial, #jury, #verdict, #judge, #Dogbert
Transcript
The foreman of the jury reads a document and says, "The jury has reached a decision in the case of 'Dogbert vs. A Big Corporation.'" The man continues, "We award Dogbert fifty million dollars because we hate big companies and we like little dogs with glasses." The man continues, "And we award a Maytag dryer to juror Mindy for being 'Best Dressed.'" The judge covers his eyes and thinks, "I hate my life."
Monday October 25,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #business report
Transcript
Dilbert hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's my time report, in fifteen minute increments." Dilbert says, "And here's my monthly project status, my budget forecast, my key accomplishments, my jeopardy list . . ." The Boss thinks as Dilbert walks away, "Never has so little been measured so much."