Pre Reading Comic Strips - Page 10

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221 Results for Pre Reading

View 91 - 100 results for pre reading comic strips. Discover the best "Pre Reading" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 24, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #shopping

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Several shopping hours left, and you just sit there." Dogbert continues, "Did you really buy enough gifts for Dogbert? You worry. Guilt and doubt begin to gnaw at your gut . . . The pain . . . The pain . . ." Dilbert says as he puts on his coat, "I thought it was the thought that counts." Dogbert says, "Don't believe the hype."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 1994's comic on:


Tags #leaving compnay, #opportunites, #key pharses, #we regret, #years of service, #footnote

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The Boss: "Tim will be leaving the company to pursue other opportunities." "Note the absence of key phrases such as 'we regret' or 'years of dedicated service.' And notice that his new opportunity is not called 'exciting'." Dilbert: "I think you're reading a little too much into that announcement." The Boss: "No, I'm reading the footnote."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 1994's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #project, #cooler, #acronym, #joke, #anticipated, #beginning, #binders, #fulfilling, #Dogbert, #job

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"I was just reading your project status report." "You say the project is delayed 'due to the ongoing bungling of a clueless, pointy-haired individual.'" "Instead of saying 'due to', it would read better as 'facilitated by'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 1995's comic on:


Tags #united charity, #below average, #pay level, #income, #local agroups, #approved list, #team player, #fund agency, #away from scoiety

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Wally stands in front of Dilbert who is seated at his desk. Wally is reading a piece of paper and says to Dilbert, "Your contributions to 'United Charity' are below average for your pay level." Dilbert says, "Actually, I donate ten percent of my income and thousands of hours to local groups not on your approved list." Wally writes on the sheet, ". . . Not a team player." Dilbert says, "I fund an agency that keeps people like you away from society."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 1995's comic on:


Tags #ass six meetings, #customer focus, #micro management, #egomaniacal mahifest, #survival, #paper towels, #mens room

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Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. Reading a report, the Boss says, "Change these dates . . . and add six more meetings and use the phrase 'customer focus.'" Dilbert looks down at the desk where a tiny figure has appeared. Dilbert says, "Uh-Oh . . . your micro-management has caused my ego to manifest itself and beg for survival." The tiny figure says, "I'm shrinking!" The Boss splats the tiny figure with a fly swatter and says to Dilbert, "Run and get me some paper towels . . . five of them . . . from the men's room."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 14, 1995's comic on:


Tags #dogbert venture capitalist, #invest 5 million, #agree, #standard conditions, #chairman of board, #mow lawn, #wash car, #touch bargainer, #multimedia developers, #gardening needs

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Dogbert sits at his desk and a businessman sits across from him. Reading from a document, Dogbert says, "I'll invest up to five million dollars if you'll agree to some standard conditions." Dogbert continues, "I will be chairman of the board and own 99% of the company. You will work for free and wash my car twice a week." The businessman asks, "Can I mow your lawn instead of washing your car?" Dogbert answers, "You're a tough bargainer, but I prefer multimedia developers for my gardening needs."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1995's comic on:


Tags #managers, #another closed door, #meeting, #pay cuts, #layoffs, #resume, #leadership vsion, #inspire employees, #action, #upgardes, #business

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The Boss and a woman walk by Dilbert's cubicle holding folders. Leaning back in his chair to look out of the cubicle, Dilbert thinks, "Uh-Oh . . . the managers are going to another closed-door meeting." Dilbert thinks, "It must be about pay cuts or layoffs. I'm doomed. I'd better work on my resume NOW." He pulls nervously at his tie, his hair stands on end and beads of sweat fly from his forehead. The Boss sits around a conference table with three other managers. Reading from a document, he says, "Okay, so far our 'leadership vision' says 'we inspire employees to action.' Does anybody have upgrades?" Another man responds, "Nah."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 12, 1995's comic on:


Tags #pundits, #press, #keyboard with no q, #public relations, #fiasco, #engineering solution, #graphics program, #semi colon

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Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk, reading a newspaper. Dilbert says, "The pundits in the press are nailing us for shipping a keyboard with no 'Q.'" Dilbert continues, "It's a public-relations fiasco. Obviously, we need an engineering solution. I'm on the case." Dilbert and Wally sit at a table. Dilbert says, "Users could use a graphics program to draw a 'Q' in the unlikely event that they need one." Wally says, "Or we could replace the semi-colon; nobody uses them."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 1995's comic on:


Tags #spare cubicles, #convicts, #bigot, #little mistake, #health plan better

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Dogbert stands in Dilbert's cubicle wearing a hard hat and reading some construction plans. Dilbert says, "I don't think it's fair to put convicts in our spare cubicles." Dogbert says, "Don't be such a bigot. These people have made one little mistake. Otherwise, they're just like employees." Dilbert says, "I think there are a few differences!" Dogbert responds, "Yeah, their health plan is better."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 1995's comic on:


Tags #retiring, #media, #vast weath, #property, #agree to be puppet, #kermit, #muppet, #lease, #Entertainment

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Dilbert sits on the couch reading with one knee bent. Dogbert stands on the cushion next to him. Dogbert says, "I'm retiring from my media empire and putting my vast wealth into real estate." Dogbert continues, "My plan is to buy all the property on earth and evict everybody who doesn't agree to be my puppet." Dilbert asks, "Can I be Kermit?" Dogbert hands Dilbert a document and says, "That's a 'Muppet.' It's all spelled out in your lease."