Problem Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

401 Results for Problem

View 91 - 100 results for problem comic strips. Discover the best "Problem" comics from Dilbert.com.

Why Didn't You Do It Sooner

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Why Didn't You Do It Sooner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, managers & supervisors, motivation, office workers, problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I solved our server reliability problem. Boss: Why didn't you do it sooner? Dilbert: If you see my motivation anywhere, tell it I miss it.

Why Did You Not Tell Me Sooner

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Why Did You Not Tell Me Sooner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, career, information, office, problem

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss to dilbert: why didn't you tell me about this problem earlier? dilbert: because you would have made decisions based on incomplete information and ruined my career. the boss walking away: okay, i didn't realize that was obvious.

Curse Of Competence

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Curse Of Competence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer software, employees, office workers, problem, sarcasm, condescending

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I need your help solving a software problem on my computer. Dilbert: Why am I cursed with the sort of competence that makes me a servant to the incapable? Man: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: If you did, you could probably fix your own problems.

Software Specs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Software Specs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, software, specifications, business, problem, unclear

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how long will it take to write the software? dilbert: that depends. what do you want the software to do? boss: i don't know yet. dilbert: do you see the problem here? boss: is it you?

User Complaints

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
User Complaints - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, technology, support, business, staff, overwhelmed, bonus, product, launch, department, problem, cause, fair

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: our tech support staff is overwhelmed because we shipped the wrong user guide with our product. boss: my bonus only depends on launching the product on time. tech support isn't my department. dilbert: you caused the problem. boss: who told you it was a fair world.

Alice Would Complain

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Would Complain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complain, managers & supervisors, assignment, business, technology, problem, solve

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i was going to give this assignment to alice, but i know she would complain about it. dilbert reading paper: i don't want it either. boss: do you plan to complain about it later? dilbert: not to your face. boss: problem solved.

Elbonian Factory Problem

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Factory Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, report, factory, elbonia, problem, lost, power, main, floor, employees, scared, trip, dark, gas, line, accident, crater, capital, explosion, unsympathetic

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: we have some problems in our elbonian factory. boss: how bad? dilbert: they lost power on the main floor. boss: that's not so bad. dilbert: the employees were scared. boss: they'll get over it. dilbert: one of them tripped in the dark. boss: big deal. dilbert: he accidentally opened a gas line. boss: a little gas never hurt anyone. dilbert: now there's a crater where the capital city used to be. boss and dilbert just looking at each other boss: let's keep an eye on that.

Dogbert Teaches Asok Tech Support

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Teaches Asok Tech Support - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, train, tech support, problem, reboot, computer, problem solving, genius

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: dogbert, i need you to train asok to fill in for you on tech support. dogbert to asok: the goal of tech support is to convince the caller the problem is on their end. i do this by recommending increasingly difficult things for them to try. eventually they give up, watch and learn. dogbert on call: uh-huh... uh-huh... try rebooting your computer. now try it again while holding control -escape-space bar- delete for exactly 27.3 seconds. no luck? try looking at your computer's binary code to find any zeros and ones that are out of order. click dogbert: and he's gone. asok: genius!

Should Have Done It Sooner

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Should Have Done It Sooner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, dollars, failure, managers & supervisors, patch, payroll, problem, raise, savings, software, technology, years

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i wrote a software patch that will save three million dollars per year. i feel as if i deserve a bonus or a raise. boss: when did you do it? dilbert: this week. boss: how long did we have the problem? dilbert: five years. boss: then you should have fixed it five years ago. looks like a gigantic failure to me. you should be ashamed of yourself. in another room catbert: did you try my strategy for keeping payroll expenses low? boss: works like magic.

Credible Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Credible Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology, credible, data, problem, test, good

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: i finished the data throughput tests, but the results are not credible because of a problem with the test. boss: does the non-credible data make us look good? alice: yes. boss: our name for that kind of data is "credible."