Rat Bert Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

109 Results for Rat Bert

View 91 - 100 results for rat bert comic strips. Discover the best "Rat Bert" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #most experiences, #die, #do nothing, #experience nothing, #immortality, #over rated, #rat, #coffee can

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says, to Bob the dinosaur, "Bob, have you ever noticed that the people with the most experience are the ones who die?" Bob says, "No." Ratbert says, "My plan is to spend the rest of my life in an old coffee can, experiencing nothing. Hence, immortality." Dilber says, to Ratber who sits in a coffee can, "How was your first week of immortality?" Ratbert says, "So far, it's overrated."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat bert, #hr dorector, #nput of employees, #morons, #sing loudly, #thinking, #pinball wizard

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Catbert: H.R. Director" Catbert says, to Asok, "I value the input of all employees..." Catbert says, "....including the morons. Although in those cases, I cover my ears and sing loudly>" Asok says, "So I was thinking maybe..." Catbert begins to sing, "He's a pinball wizard"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #disguised alice, #hat, #giant hat, #parking space, #authrized, #hire, #cat bert

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss interviews a disguised Alice. The boss says, "I'm prerpared to offer you $120,000 per year plus a parking space for your gigantic hat." Alice pulls ofer her hat and glasses and says, "Ha ha! It is I, Alice! I accept your offer for a higher-paying job!" Catbert takes of the boss mask and says, "ha ha! It is I, Catbert! I'm not authorized to hire anyone!" Alice says, "#!*ing cat!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat bert, #evil, #eliminate traces, #individuality, #computer wallpaper, #helium

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert types, "In order to eliminate all traces of individuality..." Dilbert reads, "All computer wallpaper must be the same." Dilbert thinks, "What next?" Catbert thinks, "In theory, with helium, the employees would all sound alike."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #asok alive, #cpr, #angles, #ratbert, #rat is blue, #lifesavers

View Transcript

Transcript

Sitting up on the floor, Asok rubs his head and says to The Boss, Dilbert and Wally, "I'm alive!" Asok asks Dilbert, The Boss, Wally and Alice, "Which one of you angels administered the life-saving CPR?" Ratbert says to The Boss, Asok and Alice, "Speaking of 'Lifesavers,' I could sure use one right now."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new hircut, #gargantuan, #mistake, #frighten children, #froze up, #Opinion

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks the rat and Dogbert, "What do you guys think about my new haircut?" Dogbert says, "It's a gargantuan mistake that will ruin your life, frighten children, and bruise fruit." Dogbert turns to the rat. The rat exclaims, "I'm all froze up! No one ever asked for my opinion before!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #congressional hearings, #airline, #inhumane service, #ratbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Congressional Hearings. A grim panel sits in front of microphones. One man says, "Your airline is accused of providing inhumane service. How do you respond?" Dogbert replies, "Sometimes I wag and sometimes I hold up my paw and say, 'Bah!'" Ratbert adds, "Bah!" Dogbert turns to the rat and says, "You're not allowed to say Bah. Take it back." Ratbert says quietly, "Hab."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad hotel, #bubonic inn, #elbonia, #fleas, #mattress, #what kind of fleas

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: In Elbonia. Dilbert says to an Elbonian, "Excuse me. My boss is cheap; can you direct me to a bad hotel?" The Elbonian responds, "I recommend the Bubonic Inn. It is so bad they will pay you to stay there." The man behind the hotel counter looks like a skeleton and has a rat on his head. The man says, "What kind of fleas do you want in your mattress?" Dilbert replies, "Lazy ones."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #poisoned, #bad user interface design, #crowd out ugly, #staggering beauty, #drink in, #garbageman advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: In Elbonia. Dilbert says to an Elbonian, "Excuse me. My boss is cheap; can you direct me to a bad hotel?" The Elbonian responds, "I recommend the Bubonic Inn. It is so bad they will pay you to stay there." The man behind the hotel counter looks like a skeleton and has a rat on his head. The man says, "What kind of fleas do you want in your mattress?" Dilbert replies, "Lazy ones."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rat, #meeting, #walls spot, #seat filler, #proedcest day, #career work out, #look at me now, #fired, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Wally is in the men's room. I've accepted a position as his seat filler. This is the proudest day of my life. I never ingrained that my career would work out so well, I want to scream to the world " look at name now" allyL false alarm. you're fired.