Supervisors Package Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

505 Results for Supervisors Package

View 91 - 100 results for supervisors package comic strips. Discover the best "Supervisors Package" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #managers & supervisors, #appleby ceo, #admit wrongs, #other people, #humbly admit, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The CEO of Apple says a leader should admit when he's wrong. That won't work for me because I'm never wrong. The best I can do is admit when other people are wrong. Boss: That sort of misses the point. CEO: Well, I humbly admit you're wrong.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #maintenance plan, #managers & supervisors, #over budget, #take chances, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Should we buy the maintenance plan or just take our chances? What do you prefer? Boss: I prefer to punish you for buying the maintenance plan and going over budget, but I also don't mind firing you for not buying it if we later need it. Which one of us has a better job?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #designers, #ignorance (knowledge), #black buttons, #black case, #hardware, #user interface, #normal light, #nerdy, #art, #package design

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You designed our hardware with black buttons on a black case. The user interface will be invisible in normal light. Designer: But more important, it looks great! Dilbert: You don't know what "important" means, do you? Designer: It sounds nerdy. I majored in art.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #managers & supervisors, #work ethic, #wifi enabled, #bus, #commute from san fransico, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Google provides a wi-fi enabled bus for its employees to commute from San Francisco. Why can't we be more like that? Boss: You want to be more like a bus? Dilbert: I found the problem.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #competition (psychology), #managers & supervisors, #thwarting rivals, #competitions, #expensive engineering solutions, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Have you heard any rumors about what is driving our boss's decisions lately? Alice: He's thwarting a rival within the company by offering only prohibitively expensive engineering solutions. Dilbert: My work has meaning, but it's not the good kind.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job, #hatred, #advise, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert works in collections Dilbert says, " how am I supposed to collect money from people who don't have any?" Woman says, "Tell them to rob someone you don't like." Dilbert says, "?and that's my supervisor's home address. But you'd better hurry before all the good stuff is gone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sitting, #explaining, #plan, #delivery, #stuck, #arrow

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I found a less expensive delivery service for our oversees business packages." The boss says, "Find someone who is traveling to the same country as the package, shoot him with a tranquilizer dart, and hide the package under his hat." Carol thinks, "The first day of any new system is always a problem."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #honesty, #less meetings, #less micromangemt, #managers & supervisors, #meetings, #more meetings, #more with less, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We have to learn to do more with less." Dilbert says, "Less meetings?" The Boss says, "No. We'll need more meetings to figure out how to do more with less." Alice says, "Less micro-management?" The Boss says, "No, I'll have to watch you more closely than ever to make sure you're doing mroe with less." The Boss says, "I'm talking about using less money." Alice says, "Oh, like a death spiral. Why didn't you just say that in the first place?" Alice says, "It's as if you're talking more to say less." Dilbert says, "Should we be more like you or less?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #new server, #corrupt operating system, #bad server, #recover data, #reinstall, #redeploy it, #blindingly obvious, #alternative is chaos, #chaos as good, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Build a new server to replace the one with the corrupt operating system." Dilbert says, "That's what I'm doing right now." The Boss says, "Recover the data from the bad server and put it on the new one." Dilbert says, "That's the whole point." The Boss says, "Then see if you can reinstall the operating system on the old one and redeploy it." Dilbert says, "Do you have any instructions that are not blindingly obvious?" The Boss says, "This is called managing. The alternative is chaos." Dilbert says, "How did you just make chaos sound like a good thing?" The Boss says, "You should test the new server." Dilbert says, "Seriously, can we try the chaos thing?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #environmental issues, #managers & supervisors, #government nagging, #rid of waste, #motivational paper weight, #nice going, #avoid licking, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "The government is nagging us to get rid of our dangerous radioactive waste." The Boss says, "On a totally different topic, I'm giving each of you a motivational paperweight that says, 'Nice going.'" The Boss says, "Try to avoid licking them."