Using Conference Room Comic Strips - Page 10

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

934 Results for Using Conference Room

View 91 - 100 results for using conference room comic strips. Discover the best "Using Conference Room" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #alice, #board room, #brainstorming

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Alice, Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Let's start with a brainstorming exercise. Alice, you go first." Alice closes her eyes and says, "I imagine myself not surrounded by dull, unattractive, and largely clueless men." Alice says, "Mmmm . . ." Dilbert says, "I think she just insulted you guys."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #video conference, #desktop, #telecommuting, #level of professionalism, #share document, #next time

View Transcript

Transcript

"This desktop video conference thing is great!" "Even though you're telecommuting, you still maintain a level of professionalism." "Let's share a document next time."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carpal tunnel, #surgery, #carpool, #room in carpool, #permanent damges, #wear braces, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

"I hear you need a carpool urgently." "No, I need 'carpal tunnel surgery'." "The repetitive motion of typing has caused permanent damage. I have to wear braces until the surgery." "There's no room in my carpool."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #board room, #fire employees, #no employees, #task force, #competitors, #white rumps

View Transcript

Transcript

EXECUTIVE BOARD ROOM TED: our competitors are kicking our pasty white rumps. Ted: Im bringing in dogcart to fire employees until we're stronger than the competition. Man: How will the work get done with no employees? Ted: Id better form a test force to study that.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ass six meetings, #customer focus, #micro management, #egomaniacal mahifest, #survival, #paper towels, #mens room

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk. Reading a report, the Boss says, "Change these dates . . . and add six more meetings and use the phrase 'customer focus.'" Dilbert looks down at the desk where a tiny figure has appeared. Dilbert says, "Uh-Oh . . . your micro-management has caused my ego to manifest itself and beg for survival." The tiny figure says, "I'm shrinking!" The Boss splats the tiny figure with a fly swatter and says to Dilbert, "Run and get me some paper towels . . . five of them . . . from the men's room."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #transfer, #department, #dysfunctional organization, #love and support, #long distant, #fax room, #resume, #complete jerk

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally sits in a chair across from a manager's desk. The manager asks, "Why do you want to transfer to my department, Wally?" Wally responds, "I'm in a dysfunctional organization. I'm not getting the love and support I need. That's why I've been making long-distance personal calls from the fax room." The manager says, "Your resume says every boss you've had was a complete jerk." Wally responds, "So, when do I start?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #two week retreat, #mountains, #management retreat, #four star hotle, #no room, #brag, #employees, #glib, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "Have fun working. I'm off to the two-week management retreat in the mountains." The Boss continues, "It's so sad you can't come. I guess there isn't room at the four-star hotel." As he flees from books and folders being hurled at him, the Boss thinks, "Now I know why it's called a retreat."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #using binders, #illeagl, #size of cubicle, #staus, #raise

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert hums as he stacks binders outside the door of his cubicle. Wally says, "It looks like somebody is using binders to illegally increase the size of his cubicle." Wally says angrily, "You think your status will increase with your cubicle size, don't you! Well, it won't work!" The Boss walks over, hands Dilbert a check and says, "Here's a raise. I don't know why." A woman whispers to Wally, "Pssst. Is he seeing anybody?" Wally growls, "RRRR."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #write programs, #punch cards, #rather be fishing, #snap suspenders, #alice threat, #snap you into next week, #space time continum

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice sits at a conference table typing on a laptop. An older man with a beard sits next to her. The man says, "I used to write programs using punch cards . . . But I'd rather be fishing . . ." Alice grabs the man by his suspenders and shouts, "Look, you bearded road apple, if you answer one more of my questions with an irrelevant story I'll snap you into next week!!" The caption says, "Sometime next week . . ." Dilbert and Wally see a hole in the air with a man's legs hanging out of it. Wally says, "Looks like a hole in the space-time continuum." Dilbert asks, "Did you hear a snap?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #corporate, #philosophy, #shoot, #messenger, #consulted, #engineering, #department, #launched, #ill-conceived product, #humiliated, #fired, #eileen, #document, #carpet

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at the front of the room giving a presentation. A man sitting at the conference table says, "Be candid, Dilbert. We have a corporate philosophy that says we 'don't shoot the messenger.'" Dilbert replies, "Good." Dilbert points to a diagram and says, "Had you consulted with the engineering department, you never would have launched such an ill-conceived product." Dilbert continues, "It is doomed to fail. You will all be humiliated and probably fired." A woman holding a rifle shouts, "Can't I just wing him?!!" A man says, "No, Eileen, that's not our philosophy." Dilbert arrives at home with tar and feathers on his body. He tells Dogbert, "It turns out the corporate philosophy is a very flexible document." Dogbert says, "You're getting tar on the carpet."