Alice Comic Strips - Page 100

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Alice

View 991 - 1000 results for Alice comic strips. Discover the best "Alice" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no budeget, give raisem, business trip las vegas, four million, bathrub, flooded five floors, bartenders

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Don't blame me, but there's no budget to give you a raise this year." Alice: "Why not?" The boss: "My business trip to Las Vegas cost four million dollars because I passed out in the bathtub with the water running and flooded five floors." The boss; "The bartenders there are totally irresponsible."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags accounting depot, travlke expeses, copies of receipts, need originals

View Transcript

Transcript

The Accounting Department "I can't process your travel expenses because you sent me copies of receipt. I need the originals." "I'm busy. Just fax them."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags 400 per hour, expensive, ball rolling, process using, recommendations

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Mister Dogbert has agreed to consult for $400 per hour. "I know it's expensive but you get what you pay for." "Let's get the ball rolling." "My first question is: what process will you be using to arrive at your recommendations?" Dogbert: "a..." "very...slow one..."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, punch back, stress hump, karate chop

View Transcript

Transcript

The New Guy "Hey, new guy, that's quite a stress hump you have there maybe I can fix it." "Punch Yaaa!!" "Wow!! It's gone! Does that always work?" "I dunno. To be honest, I just wanted to punch it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaints, badering manager, deciosn on issue, emails phonecalls, insist on the job, overpaid

View Transcript

Transcript

I've received some complaints that you've been badgering the managers. "Hmm...badgering you say." "Let me see if I understdnd this "badgering" concept." "Let's say that I need a manager's decision on a critical issue..." "And the manager in question ignores my e-mails and phone calls..." "shouldn't I insist that this manager do the job for which he is overpaid?!!!" "Huh? Shouldn't I? What do you say? Huh? Huh? How about it? Huh?" "I'll say I talked to her."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags inspirational, failed to motivate, cowowrkers, sabotage career

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally; "Once again you have failed to motivate me." Wally: "I don't want to become like my coworkers, always plotting ways to sabotage your career." Wally: "Now would be a good time for you to say something inspirational."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags disbale cahe mode, duplicate key, engineer, helping coowrker, technical work, understand, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

ALICE: "Just disable the local cache mode to fix the MAPI settings, and delete the duplicate messaging sub-system registry key." TINA: "What if I don't understand anything you said right then? ALICE: Good grief! I can't make it any simpler!" TINA: "GAAA!!!" ALICE: "It's funny because it's cruel."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical glitch, humble, condescending engineer, teach you to ask, drinking beer, study english, sorry

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Oh No. It's a technical glitch that I don't know how to fix. "GAA! NOw I must humble myself to some condescending engineer and ask for help!" Alice: "And how did I teach you to ask?" Tina: "I'm sorry that I spent my college years drinking beer and studying English literature."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags emailed file, accomplishments, entire month, open the file, down load, browser, upgrade broswer, operating system, upagrde, software, hard disk, view of file, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

"My accomplishement this month was opening a file that someone e-mailed." "That took an entire month?" "It wasn't that easy. I didn't have the right software to open the file." "I tried to download the viewer from the Internet but the Web site didn't support my browser." "And I couldn't upgrade my browser until I updated my operating system!" "That required me to upgrade all of my software, too." "My hard disk got maxed out, so I had to upgrade my computer and transfer all of the files." "So, then you got to view the file?" "Yeah...It was a funny one about a cat."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags raises, more pay, mathy, don't get mathy

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Don't feel bad if you only got a 3% raise; I only got 2% myself. Alice: "Can we feel bad that 2% if your pay is bigger than 3% of our pay?" The Boss: "Don't get all mathy on me."