Boss's Boss Comic Strips - Page 100

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View 991 - 1000 results for boss's boss comic strips. Discover the best "Boss's Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 04, 2012's comic on:


Tags #monkeys, #big picture, #motivated, #monkey, #assignment, #eating banana, #imitating monkey, #animals

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Dilbert: I would feel more motivated if I knew how my assignment fits into the big picture. Boss: You don't need to be motivated. A monkey could do your assignment while eating a banana. Like this. Ooh-ooh-ooh! Dilbert: I think we're moving in the wrong direction.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 13, 2012's comic on:


Tags #public opinion, #feedback, #idea, #smart people

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Boss: What feedback have other people given you on your idea? Dilbert: Smart people like it. Everyone else asks me what other people think.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #libertarianism, #standards meeting, #elbonia, #legal, #meeting, #business

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Boss: Wally, I need you to attend a standards meeting in Elbonia. Wally: Heh, heh. A lot of things are legal in Elbonia that aren't legal here. Boss: Are any of you not libertarians? Wally: Heh, heh, heh.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 2012's comic on:


Tags #telephones, #reprogrammed speed dial, #cellphone, #calls himself, #intelligence test, #hold on, #failed intelligence test, #20 minutes

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Dilbert: I reprogrammed our pointy-haired boss/ speed dial on his desk phone. Now every time he tries to use speed dial, it calls his own cellphone. It's like an intelligence test. I want to see how long it takes him to figure it our. Boss: I'd better take this. Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hold on. Hold on. For the hundredth time, don't tell me to hold on! I'm telling you to hold on! Carol: Twenty minutes so far.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2012's comic on:


Tags #country, #etiquette & ethics, #meeting, #mens restroom, #sacred, #sacred shrine, #travel, #elbonia, #business

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Boss: How was your meeting in Elbonia? Wally: Awesome! Did you know that the most sacred shrine in Elbonia looks exactly like a men's restroom? Boss: No. Wally: Right. So don't blame me for not knowing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2012's comic on:


Tags #minerals, #moons orbit, #rocket boosters, #science fiction, #asteroid, #precious metals, #afghanistan

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Dilbert: Rocket boosters will move an asteroid into the moon's orbit so we can mine its precious metals. Boss: Why don't we mine for precious metals in Afghanistan? They have lots of them. Dilbert: That only happens in science fiction.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 2012's comic on:


Tags #universities & colleges, #cost analysis, #data centers, #good investment, #college, #education

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Boss: Do a cost analysis for consolidating our data centers. No matter what the data says, make sure your conclusion is that it's a good investment. Dilbert: Remind me why I went to college. Boss: Some liar probably convinced you it was a good investment.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 23, 2012's comic on:


Tags #fraudulent analysis, #total betrayal, #shareholders, #rational beghavior

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Dilbert: I finished the fraudulent analysis you requested to support the decision you already made. It's a total betrayal of shareholders and a slap in the face for anyone who values rational behavior. Boss: Thanks. That's exactly what I wanted. Dilbert: You're welcome.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2012's comic on:


Tags #copyright & trademark, #farmers & farm workers, #violates patents, #close compnay, #lawyer, #off grid, #legal

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Lawyer: Our new product violates 70 Google patents, 14 Apple patents, 52 Oracle patents, and 37 Microsoft patents. There is no hope. I recommend that we close the company and become farmers. Boss: I need a lawyer with more fight in him. Lawyer: I'm off the grid.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 2012's comic on:


Tags #huge fee, #non practicing entity, #patent troll, #patents, #playing field, #plunge civilization, #tangle innovation, #thwart compnies, #dark ages

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Dogbert: I'm a patent troll, but you can call me a non-practicing entity. For a huge fee, I will use my patents to thwart the companies that are trying to thwart you with their own patents. Together we can strangle innovation and plunge civilization into the dark ages! Boss: That would even the playing field.