One Condition Comic Strips - Page 100
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1000 Results for One Condition
View 991 - 1000 results for one condition comic strips. Discover the best "One Condition" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday October 26,
2005
Tags grim reaping, field, unpaid overtime cases, see guys die
Transcript
"Someday I hope to get into the grim reaping field." "I don't mind working these unpaid overtime cases, but just once I'd like to see one of you guys die." "Hey, I just realized that my rake is very blunt."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday November 18,
2005
Tags buy advertsising, gullible world, 2 billion readers, three readers
Transcript
Would you like to buy advertising in my new magazine called 'Gullible World'? "We have between one and two billion readers!" "Wow!" "I figured out how to make three readers sound like a lot."
Tuesday November 22,
2005
Tags seminar, difficult cowrokers, groups, quit job, syndicated cartoonist
Transcript
Welcome to my seminar on dealing with difficult coworkers. "Difficult coworkers generally fall into one of these groups." LAZY MEAN SMART CRAZY "The only way to deal with them is to quit your job and become a syndicated cartoonist." "Thanks for coming."
Wednesday November 23,
2005
Tags ted snadwhich, left in breakroom, marked ted, lost weight, anger, red faced
Transcript
"I'll be right back. I'm going to grab a Ted sandwich before the meeting." "A what?" "The food people always leave one sandwich in the break room fridge labeled Ted. It tastes like ham." "You're looking good, Ted. Have you lost weight?"
Friday November 25,
2005
Tags cubicle cockroach, working hardly, kill it, flame thrower
Transcript
"Good morning, Alice!" "Uh-oh, a cubicle cockroach." "Are you working hard or hardly working? Ha ha!" "I must find a way to kill it." "Do you have a flame thrower?" "I can't complain; no one would listen!"
Tuesday November 29,
2005
Tags two ceos, top job, syockholders, average employees slaary
Transcript
"After the merger, we'll have two CEOs sharing the top job." "A spokesperson explained 'If our stockholders don't mind paying one CEO 450 times the average employee's salary..." "...They shouldn't mind doing it twice.'"
Wednesday December 07,
2005
Tags bed idea, new sourpuss, optimism, leadership 90 5 opitimism
Transcript
"Meet our new Sourpuss." "I heard that every office has one. And we didn't, so I went out and got one." "Does anything ever sound like a bad idea to you?" "Leadership is 90% optimism."
Monday December 12,
2005
Tags ran six miles, topper, hopped to work, broken leg, better, more better
Transcript
Topper "I ran six miles even though I was sore." "That's nothing." "I broke my leg and hopped all the way to work this morning." "You hopped 40 miles on your one good leg?" "On the broken one."
Wednesday December 21,
2005
Tags charging time, projects, no work, wind, existence of your wind, farting around
Transcript
"Wally, you've been charging your time to several projects, but no one has ever seen you work." "You can't see the wind, either, but surely you don't doubt that it exists." "I've also gotten complaints about the existence of your wind." "I rest my case."
Monday December 26,
2005
Tags less money, use bydget, flexible, approving expenses
Transcript
"I need to use up my budget before the end of the year or else I'll get less next year." "So I'll be flexible about approving expenses for a few days. Wink, wink." "Nice coffee-holding panda." "You should see the one that isn't pregnant."